Sharing the Blessing on TLC

Debby Gullery
July 2012
Co-Director of Blessed Family Ministry

"Brainwashed," "Crazy," "Cult" -- we've been called it all. Maybe that's what you get when you get when you exchange marital vows with several thousand other brides and grooms. Yet, despite the Unification Church's history of persecution, one cannot ignore the growing number of Unificationist-born couples who are following in their parents' footsteps and choosing to tie the knot at one of Reverend and Mrs. Moon's Holy Marriage Blessing Ceremonies. Especially in a nation riddled with serial dating, marital infidelity, and divorce, more people are curious to understand why we view the Marriage Blessing Ceremony as something so unique and precious.

My son, Toby, and his wife, Sun Young Biddle (affectionately known as Sunny), are going places! I'm talking about mainstream television in the United States and the United Kingdom. Firecracker Films, a new, fast-growing production company based in London has just completed a documentary on arranged marriages between Unificationist-born young adults in England. The documentary followed three couples in the weeks leading up to the March 24, 2012, Holy Marriage Blessing Ceremony and during the ceremony itself. Unification Church leaders in England were impressed by the way the film company handled the situation and were hopeful that the documentary would show our movement in a positive light. After several months of Firecracker's filming, The Learning Channel (TLC), an American production company, heard about the European documentary and decided to do a similar documentary using an American Unificationist-born couple. TLC proposed this idea to Firecracker Films and asked for suggestions for a matched and engaged couple in the New York area that would be willing to be in the documentary.

Toby Gullery and Sun Young Biddle hold hands at their engagement ceremony witnessed by family and friends.

The Marriage Blessing Ceremony was going to be held in Korea, so they wanted a couple that was going there for the ceremony, as opposed to one who would attend the ceremony via satellite-broadcast somewhere in America.

Because I work for the Blessed Family Ministry, I received the call from Firecracker Films and was asked to find a couple that met their description. Lo and behold, the only couple in the area planning to go to Korea was my son and his then-fiance, Sunny Biddle!

From the Blessed Family Ministry's perspective, we were both excited and nervous to have Toby and Sunny in the documentary. We were excited because there have been a lot of investment in and improvements to the matching and engagement process and we were delighted to show what we have established; we were proud that our matching and engagement process had become a smart and successful way to get married.

At the same time, it can be nerve-racking anytime the media interview a member of the Unification Church, because of the negative publicity we've received in the past. My husband and I have had recent experiences when we shared honestly about our beliefs, and the interviewers still found a way to pull in old junk from the internet or other resources to mix up what we had said.

Most importantly, though, as a mother I felt proud of my son for the courageous decision he made to not only be followed around by cameras and be shown on television, but to proudly represent the Unification Church and speak up for its ideals.

Left to right: Patrick McCormick: Firecracker Films director Barbie MacLaurin: Sunny, Debby. Jonathan and Toby Gullery: and cameraman Paul Wood-Walker, Lovin' Life Ministries. New York. March 2012.

Toby is the youth pastor in Westchester, New York, and Sunny is a two-year Generation Peace Academy graduate from Ohio, so they are both involved in church-related activities and understand the importance of representing our church well. Sunny wasn't so sure how she felt about doing the initial interview, but, as she put it, she "saw it as a great chance to see Toby again!" The more she thought about it, the more she realized it was a great chance for people to understand who we are as Unificationists and for other Unificationist-born youth to have hope to be happy." Luckily Toby had the same idea as Sunny, saying, "I saw this as a chance to put a positive light on our church's traditions as well as take part in being a good role model for younger brothers and sisters, showing them that the matching and blessing process can be, and is, successful, fun, and romantic, not scary or confusing."

"Of course it was much more intense than I expected," said Sunny, "It was a three-day commitment in New York and the whole time we were in Korea." It was quite stressful on the entire Gullery family: interviews all day and having to repeat scenes over and over again just so the camera crew could get the perfect shot. During the three days of filming Sunny, Toby, and the crew attended some events at the Lovin' Life Learning Center in New York City, including ballroom dancing and Open Mic. "The best part of the documentary was getting the chance to sing the song I wrote for Sunny at Open Mic. Of course I had to sing it twice because something didn't go right for the sound guy. I had sung with every ounce of my being and then they asked me to do it all again!" Through all the stress, the new couple still found a way to include romance in the shots.

During the three days in New York, Toby and Sunny realized it wasn't just about letting others know the beauty of our traditions and beliefs, but also about making those beliefs more solid within themselves. Toby said, "Answering the questions the interviewer asked over and over again reaffirmed my faith. In order to answer her, I had to go and figure out what I sincerely feel and believe."

Media are media, and they always work hard to get something juicy for their story. So Toby and Sunny had to be careful with what they said in front of the camera. In a traditional marriage in the United States, the couple usually kisses after the ceremony, but Toby and Sunny had never kissed before. Immediately after the ceremony, therefore, the film crew asked Toby, "Aren't you going to kiss the bride?" At first he and Sunny said they wouldn't kiss, but, of course, the camera crew really pushed them to get it on film. They finally agreed, though Sunny said, "It was a bit weird to kiss in front of a camera, but at least we have our first kiss on film to keep forever!"

In May, Sunny moved to Westchester to live with her husband; Toby was very pleased. The film crew stopped by for a follow-up interview to see how the new couple was faring two months after the Blessing -- it was clear the couple was very happy together.