The Words of the Kamiyama Family
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The Words of the Kamiyama Family |
Rev.
Kamiyama shows everyone the shoes Father gave him on his last day in
Danbury.
Rev. Kamiyama could not speak about the injustice done to Father without tears coming to his eyes and to the eyes of his translator.
The way for us to redirect ourselves and our nations is, I feel, to follow Father's lifestyle. The time has come again to remember Father's way of life while he was in Danbury.
I can never forget the day of our incarceration on July 20, 1984 -- how Father and I went into the prison and got registered. First we had to be stripped of our clothes. Every new inmate has to go through a complete body check. They check all the parts and openings of the body, with gloves. I could bear this myself, but to see Father have to strip and be touched all over by those fallen men -- I can't express the indignation I felt! I was in tremendous agony to think of how much Father had been living for the sake of America and that he was now being treated like this. Then Father had to put on used, dirty, stained underwear that had been thrown into a pile to be washed.
Besides that, there were no blankets, sheets, or pillows for our bunk beds. The officers told us to just pick up anything we could find, used or not. It was not easy to receive that kind of deliberately abusive treatment in a civilized country. I couldn't help having the feeling that Father had been betrayed. Father had worked so hard and dedicated his sweat and tears and even blood to this country, and now this country was treating him in this horrible way! I had such a desire for revenge! That was the enraged state I was in at the beginning of the incarceration -- full of agony and indignation.
Father could see what was going on in my mind, so he began to comfort me. He said, "Kamiyama, don't be upset. Look at this world. It is a world without parents; it's like an orphanage. People are always fighting each other, struggling among themselves. In order for you or me to become parents for this world, we must go through a rock- bottom suffering course. To reach the highest level, the parents' position, this is the way we must go."
Father tried to calm me down by telling me how the lowest and highest points always correspond to each other. He asked me to consider, for example, that the human sexual organ has two functions: It is the beginning point of new life, and it also passes unwanted human waste. The most exalted purpose and the lowliest purpose are united there.
Therefore, he said, we must be willing to go through the lowest in order to reach the highest. He was teaching me the point of overcoming and loving the enemy.
I feel we must inherit this quality of loving our enemy -- this living example of Father. We are often very lazy in following True Parents' standard or tradition. If somebody blames us for something, we immediately react negatively and start defending ourselves. That's not really the level we should be at.
[Rev. Kamiyama holds up the underwear Father received on the day he was incarcerated.]
Father had to wear this dirty underwear for several days in the beginning until they supplied him with clean ones. This is just a piece of material, but this shows graphically how much Father was despised by mankind. It's a symbolic item to show how we, fallen man, crucified Father on the cross of the heart. We, as representatives of mankind, have to repent and really think about how much we failed to protect Father, which led him to have to endure such a wretched situation.
But Father's heart is that he never takes anything in a resentful way. He took all this as his path of indemnity, with gratitude, even comforting me who was upset with the situation. That was Father -- forgiving America, loving America and the world. We need to learn once again that Father -- with a heart of forgiveness -- went through all this humiliation without a word. Father never talks about his rights. He only talks about his duty to carry the cross. This is the attitude we should learn.
Father
and Rev. Kamiyama in the cubicle they shared at Danbury.
In Danbury Father always chose the worst, dirtiest jobs to do. Father's job was to clean and set up the kitchen. As you know, most of the inmates in Danbury were convicted because they were doing something illegal to get big money. They didn't want to work hard but only wanted to find loopholes so they could get rich. In other words, they were lazy. You can't imagine how carelessly they treated things and each other, how selfish they were. In the bathrooms urine was all over the floor, and because no one wanted to stand close to the toilets, more and more got all over the floor. It's fallen man's selfish tendency that he doesn't want to touch someone else's dirt or go out of his way to clean it up.
The kitchen was just as bad. People would use wash rags to wipe off the old grease from the grill and then throw them in a bucket in the corner. Nobody wanted to touch that smelly bucket. So Father picked that particular job. Using very strong detergent, he would with the greasy rags.
Naturally in my heart, I couldn't let Father do that. I tried to take the bucket away from Father, but I couldn't push him away physically. Rather, he pushed me away, saying, "Kamiyama, your hands are weak." I had already done some cleaning with strong detergent and my hands were starting to peel. Father said, "Get away, Kamiyama! This is my duty." Father scrubbed and rinsed the rags and neatly folded them and carried them back to be used by others.
Father also took upon himself the job of cleaning the dirty toilets, which the inmates used in such a selfish way. Seeing Father's behavior, the inmates who had judged and despised Father in the beginning began to open their hearts. One day one of the inmates called me over and said, "Please tell the Reverend not to worry about cleaning the rags.
This is a rich country that pays lots of taxes, so the prison can always give us a new supply of cloths. He doesn't have to wash them." In other words, he was sympathizing with Father. I reported this to
Father, and he said, "That's his philosophy; it's not mine. If people do not take care of material things in a precious way, the future of their country is doomed." If all of us could inherit Father's spirit of taking care of the dirtiest places with love, then I'm sure that whatever we are engaged in will succeed and our movement will prosper.
Besides taking care of the worst areas, Father poured out his love and concern very sincerely to every inmate. Father wanted to know about everyone's situation. He even started saying things to me like, "Kamiyama, why does that old man look so lonely? Why doesn't he have any visitors? What has he done to come to the prison?" Then he would tell me to go over and talk to that person and find out about him.
Each inmate was allowed $90 a month to spend on things from the commissary, like fruit, juice, drinks, and cookies. Father would spend all his money and then ask me to give away everything he bought to the inmates, especially to those who were lonely and had no visitors. Sometimes I too had a craving for fruit, because the prison food wasn't too tasty, and so actually I wanted to have some of the fruit he bought. But even though I had a struggle in my heart, I delivered everything to the inmates. That was Father's way.
Father's love and care changed the inmates' opinion about Father. I saw that within a very short time, people's feelings about Father changed from dirty accusation and hatred to respect and even adoration. In the beginning they said to him, "Hey, Moon! Why don't you wash over there?" That kind of nasty attitude was forced to change into at least "Mr. Moon" after a while, and then to "Rev. Moon." By the end, people started to call him "Father."
We had to wear what was supplied to us by the prison. Father wore the sneakers that were given to him. After a while he purchased one more pair, but he never put them on. I thought he should alternate wearing the two pairs, because in the summertime they got smelly. Many times I suggested that to him, but he never did. I didn't understand why he never wore the other pair until the day I left. On that day Father said to me, "Kamiyama, you are leaving Danbury and starting a new life and a new dedication. I have nothing to give you in this prison here, except for these, which I have kept for you." It was the unused pair of sneakers.
I felt very indebted in my heart, yet I had to accept them because this was the way Father was preparing me to start my new life of dedication. I was going to carry them out of the prison, but Father made me put them on. As I bent over to tie them, Father said, "Kamiyama, you don't know how to tie your shoelaces properly." He knew that I knew how to do it, but he used that as an excuse to tie them himself. With his chunky body, he bent over and started tying my shoelaces. What could I do? I felt it was impossible for me to let him do that, so immediately I retreated back a yard. But then Father followed me! He wouldn't let go, so he kept after me, tying my shoes.
Here was Father, who has reached such a level, tying the shoelaces of me, his disciple. I want you to evaluate with me the value of this act. You've got to understand; this is a living testimony of True Father's love. Two thousand years ago, Jesus washed the feet of his disciples, showing them the standard of love he wanted them to inherit. I didn't feel Father was doing this for me, Kamiyama, personally -- no, it was for all of us. If any of you had been there, I know Father would have done it for you. I just happened to be the instrument.
[Rev. Kamiyama shows everyone the shoes Father gave him as well as the pair Father wore every day]
This is the way Father tied them -- I haven't touched them since. These shoes are going into our museum. Which pair would you prefer to wear? I bet you would choose the ones Father wore, but Father didn't even touch this pair in order to give them to me. He wrote the date and my name and his signature on the inside of the shoes.
These are a treasure for me, so I am keeping them in the safest, deepest part of my closet! They can be a great museum item in the future. This pair, supplied to Father in prison, he wore continuously. I keep them in Japan in a very special place, in a beautiful box. Maybe sometime you can see them in a museum, perhaps encased in a golden box.
My showing you these things is of serious importance -- that we are reminded of the "shoes of a servant" that Father wore. They are to help us repent. Even with the most disgusting treatment, under the most adverse conditions and persecution, Father wouldn't say a word of complaint or contempt -- nothing. Father only took on a heart of gratitude. With gratitude, he was willing to carry any cross. That's the tradition we ought to inherit by all means. I feel very strongly in my heart that once again, we should be reminded about what Father went through, and how to inherit his spirit.
One of the instructions Father gave me when I came out of Danbury, which he wrote down in Chinese characters, is that service and living for the sake of others has to be the standard. Be a good example in your daily activities. The number-one priority is reading the Principle and building stronger faith. Inherit the love of True Parents. Live a life of sacrifice in order to establish love -- in front of you, in back of you, to your right and left, and in all areas surrounding you. It is very important to take time to love and serve and create relationships of love, to deepen relationships. Do not worry that you might lose time from your external responsibilities; that cannot be an excuse not to make deeper relationships. A last point was: Become one with the Korean senior leadership, one with the American leaders, one with the German and European leaders, and of course, one with all brothers and sisters. These are the instructions I received when I got out of Danbury.
I've never showed these clothes in public, but I brought them today here to show you, so you may touch them and inherit Father's love and forgiveness. I don't think I'm the only person who was to receive that love or forgiveness. It is for all of us.
Love in response to hatred, gratitude in response to adversity -- let us inherit this beautiful tradition of our True Parents. That is what I feel we must do.
Thank you very much.