The Words of the Kim Family Before 2008
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The Words of the Kim Family Before 2008 |
Mrs. In Ju Kim is one of the early members in our church. She met Father for the first time in 1946 in Pyongyang. She is the person who brought Won Pil Kim to Father.
On June 22, 1983, Mrs. Kim spoke to brothers and sisters of the New York Tribune sharing her extraordinary experiences. Nick Buscovich, her son-in-law, who is also vice president of the paper, gave a short introduction: "... and it is through the living testimonies of our older brothers and sisters that we can understand the foundation on which we are standing today..."
I Corinthians Chapter 13... Out of all the words in that chapter, "faith" and "love" have been the most meaningful and treasured words in my life. I grew up in a Presbyterian family. My grandparents were Presbyterians, and my father and mother were elders in the Presbyterian Church.
My primary school was different from regular primary schools during the Japanese occupation. It was more like a parochial school run by Presbyterian teachers, and from one teacher at school I learned why I should love Jesus and how I should be a Christian. From when I was a Sunday school student until I became an adult, my deepest desire always was to know more about Jesus, because he was the center of my life. In fact, throughout my schooling and my life, there were people around me who told me about loving Jesus and about how wonderful Jesus' life was.
My Sunday school teacher always taught us that we should industriously memorize the verses in the Bible, that we should witness with all our hearts, and come to church every day, not missing even one day in the whole year. On Saturdays, we would go witnessing in order to have a lot of people coming to church on Sunday. During my primary school, and also during junior high school, I always received many awards from the church because I was very dedicated. Later, I attended a missionary school and dedicated myself 100 percent to Christian work. The minister of this school taught the Bible as a main course, so I took the opportunity to learn more about the Bible.
At the time I lived in Pyongyang, which was the capital of North Korea. They used to call Pyongyang the second Jerusalem because the revival of Christianity there was so strong, with huge revival meetings and many individual spiritual inspirations. I attended almost all of those meetings trying to find out more about Jesus and Christianity.
In such a city, with a high spiritual atmosphere surrounding me, I grew up as a teenager. Since my parents were elders in the church, I was told to attend only the prayer meetings sponsored by the Presbyterians. However, I secretly attended almost all the revival meetings of other churches as well. I would simply lie to my parents, telling them that I was going to my friend's house to study. Then I would escape and go to different revival meetings.
In those days, Buddhist monks came down from the mountains and had powerful revivals of their own. They'd come around to the houses asking for alms of rice and other food. But my parents would never give them anything because as Presbyterians we gave only to our own church. But behind my parents' backs I would always try to give alms to the Buddhists.
Looking back now, I came to know many different denominations at a young age.
When I was 20 years old, I had finished my high school and I was trying to go to college, but in Korea by the time you are 20 or 21 you are considered an old maid. So my grandmother and parents were adamant that I shouldn't go to college. Otherwise I would be too old to get married. So I married Won Pil Kim's uncle, who was suggested to me by one of Won Pil Kim's relatives. That's also how I met Mr. Won Pil Kim. Since I myself couldn't go to college I was determined to send all my children, which I did. All five of them are college graduates.
Soon I gave birth to two children. And around that time my sister-in-law came one day and told me a very famous preacher had come from Seoul and would speak. I still was going to a very well-known Presbyterian church in Pyongyang, but because I liked revival meetings and new things, I listened to my sister-in-law and went to this place to hear the new teacher speaking.
I was used to the big church protocol where you sang a few songs, then prayed, and then a man would give a testimony or speech. But at this place, everybody was singing holy songs all the time, just kept singing and singing. I became so moved and received the Holy Spirit in my heart, feeling tremendous blessings from God.
Father himself wasn't just singing the songs. While singing he sweated all over and his eyes were filled with tears even though he was just singing a song, a regular Christian hymn. When I looked at him, after I opened my eyes, his clothes, his tee-shirt and even his outside suit were completely wet. And so was the Korean style floor made out of paper around him, soaked with his tears and sweat.
Then Father was giving a small talk to the group that was gathering. On that day Father's sermon was about Jesus. He declared that Jesus did not come to earth to die on the cross; and he made it very clear that God did not send his son, who was 33 years old at that time, to die on the cross, but he sent him on earth to substantially accomplish God's will and do great things. However, because of the Jewish people, because of the Pharisees who didn't listen to Jesus, he had to go on the cross. But this was not God's desire. That was the first sermon I heard from Father.
From my Presbyterian church, of course, I was taught that Jesus had come to die on the cross, and it was stressed that only because of the cross, I could be saved. But here was a man saying that without the cross Jesus should have brought forth salvation to mankind. When I heard this message, I was feeling almost the same pain that Jesus must have felt from the spear that was stabbed into his side, and the nail that was put through his feet and hands.
On that first day when I met Father I was blessed with so much revival feeling and Holy Spirit in my heart. And in the same night I received a spiritual dream.
In my dream, I had to go to a big cave, a very long tunnel-type cave, which was very dark. At the gate there was a man standing who told me, "You have to go through this dark tunnel, which is very dangerous and difficult. But don't give up, don't waver, just go straight forward." After meeting him, and hearing this, I started walking in, but it was so dark and it soon was getting hard for me to continue. Then I remembered what the man had told me and I went straight on. Soon I saw something like a ray of morning piercing the darkness, a white ray coming from the end of the tunnel. This gave me strength and I continued on.
As I came to the ray, there was a light shining and a man was standing there. It was the man I had seen the day before, Father, and right next to him were some Koreans who carried a casket in a ritual way. I was very afraid to see the casket, because it was open and contained a rotten body which then was being melted. The very dirty, putrid fluid from the body came toward me, wetting my legs.
But Father was standing there. He motioned to me to come over. I recognized in him the same man I had met the day before, so I went there. And in front of me I saw a big bowl, like the kind in Korea in which you wash your face. It contained a little water and Father himself cleansed my leg with it and told me to go to the next mountain in front of me. So I did.
There were small bushes before me, and I felt as though Father told me to go through. I just followed my feeling. After I passed through the bushes, a forest of flowers opened in front of me, flowers of a beauty such as I had never seen before.
I love flowers (they always make me very happy), and these flowers there in front of me were truly magnificent. But what was even more surprising to me was that, as I went along the flowery path, there was a man standing together with Jesus. Even thinking of Jesus gave me so much happiness, and here he was standing in front of me! Especially seeing him for the first time in the dream was really overwhelming. He took my hand, and led me all over the garden, giving me a very good tour of each place with all the different flowers.
The day of this dream was June 11, 1946. Father came to Pyongyang on June 6, and I met him on June 11, and that same night I had this dream. So the next day, I went to see this young man, Father, again.
In Pyongyang, only the people who went to church morning and evening in any weather would sometimes receive a dream of Jesus, but only after hours and days of long prayer. But with me, I met Father once, and I saw Jesus as a real person -- walked with him and everything -- so I decided to follow this man to see more of Jesus.
I went to see Father every day, and each day I received so many blessings, so much of the Holy Spirit. Some mornings I didn't realize whether I was in my body or out of it, because prophecies were flowing out of my mouth. Every morning I would look around, and God would show me what the new Garden of Eden looked like. Every day I would hear His voice in my ears. I would go to hear the young man talk, and I came home and received great blessings from God. This was happening all the time.
Also I constantly had spiritual dreams. In one dream all the kings of the world came to Father and bowed down to him. Father was just 27 years old and I was 30 years old. This dream was fulfilled in October in Seoul at the time of the 6,000 couples Blessing, when representatives from all over the world gathered before Father.
When I had these dreams, I usually went to Father to tell him about what I received. Yet before I could even speak anything, he would say, "Well, did you see all the kings come to me and bow down to me like that?" He always knew what I had dreamed and told me before I could even open my mouth.
One day I had a dream in which God told me that the words in Isaiah 60 will be realized by this young man, Father. So the next day when I saw Father again he greeted me with the words, "Did God tell you last night that Isaiah 60 would be realized?"
I really had to look again at this young man. Who is this person who knows my dreams? Who can tell before I speak what my dreams were the night before? I decided that this was the man I must follow. He was the one to whom I must confide all my things, the one who should decide things for me. It was clear that I must give him all my attention and confidence.
From that moment on, I couldn't go back to my Presbyterian church, where I had been an ideal member, the treasurer of the teenage group, and a Sunday school student and teacher.
The minister, the lay leaders and many others came to my house and told me, "Listen, in the last days many antichrists will come, and will try to convert you to end your spiritual and physical life. Therefore, please, don't go there anymore." They would hold special prayer meetings in my home, but God would tell me, "Don't attend the meeting." So I never would go to those special meetings at my own house.
My parents, being elders of the church, would tell me, "You are really insulting us and shaming our family, because we are elders and you are attending this crazy antichrist group. What are you trying to do? You've gone to our Christian church all your life, and now you're saying that God does not reside here anymore? God only resides in your group?" My parents started persecuting me in this way.
They told me, "Since you don't listen to us any more, Satan surely has entered your body. So we must expel Satan from you and restore you from that terrible antichrist organization. Since you won't listen to our words, we'll have to use force." Then my father and my mother started beating me, my father not so much but my mother every day.
In spite of their abuse, I kept going to Father's place. So one day they tied two big German shepherds to the front and the back gate, so whenever I tried to leave the house, the dogs would bark, and then my parents would catch me and beat me again.
There was almost no way I could see Father to learn about the Bible, so I created an excuse, telling my parents I had to go and buy a toothbrush. Then I left, saw Father, and came back. On the next day, I told my parents I needed to buy toothpaste and other things. I don't remember all the items I decided to buy, but I divided up my shopping list and bought one item at a time, using each occasion to meet Father.
One day, my parents found out about my trick and, of course, prevented me from shopping. From then on, I had no way to see Father, so I made up another excuse -- to see my in-laws. My husband's house was behind the place where Father was staying, so to go to my husband's house there was one wall to overcome. I prepared very beautiful presents and food and told my parents I would visit my in-laws and give it to them. Then I escaped to Father's house and learned more about the Bible and Heavenly Father.
In order to go over the wall, which was twice my height, I would get a chair, place it by the wall, and stand on it. Then my sister-in-law would cross her hands and lift me up so I could go over the wall. At that time, I was pregnant with Nicholas Buscovich's wife (Hae Young), but still I would go over the wall to Father's house and listen to him.
In Korea, people usually say that if a woman is carrying a boy, she can lose him very easily if she doesn't take care. But in my case, even though I was pregnant I kept going over the wall and I didn't lose the child. Therefore, I thought it must be a daughter. So it was.
I actually needed tremendous courage to climb over the wall and see Father and I always expected him to especially notice me and to tell me more about the new teachings of the Bible.
At that time, Father was giving sermons based on the Divine Principle, but it was not written down. He was telling about the mission of Jesus, the process of restoration, and so on, one topic after another, and I had to wait and listen to him on all these things. Right now, you are very lucky because you have everything written in a book. In those days, I had to go over to Father's home to listen to only a bit at a time.
Once Father started praying, he wouldn't stop for a long, long time, and I'd be so frustrated and sometimes even angry because I would go through all the trouble to see him and hear his words, and he would start praying and seemingly never end So I'd go to the next room and I would wait until he stopped. When Father starts praying he really becomes one with God, and the tears come out, and he always perspires a great deal. After that, Father would come to the room where I was and talk about the meaning of the Bible.
My parents again found out that I was still seeing this young man Moon, so this time they locked me into my room, in my house, and wouldn't even let me cook or anything. My mother still beat me. But after some time, she gave up. Finally my parents gave permission to my husband, saying, "Now you have to beat her and make sure she doesn't leave. We clean our hands. It's up to you now to take care of our daughter, your wife." My husband was a very athletic man -- he was famous in North Korea. Besides, he also was a gymnastics and physical education teacher.
I was completely imprisoned in my own house, and at that time Nicholas' wife was born, a very small baby. It was January and very cold. My room had a glass window, but they replaced it with wood from outside so I couldn't see anything. I couldn't see Father or the members any more. But there was a crack in the window, and I would peek out in the winter time and was able to see members going by. I could see Won Pil Kim and some others. Just even looking at them going by filled me with so much warmth and joy.
When I was locked in my room, I still received revelations from God. I recorded everything and gave it to the girl who was working in my house to give to Father. But I still wanted to see Father in person.
So when my husband and my parents were out of the house, I managed to sneak out to see Father and come back again. My mother again found out about it, but she wouldn't do anything since she already had given up on me. So she waited until the end of the day for my husband to come back and told him, "Your wife took off again to that crazy place." And he just smacked me right in the face. As I said before my husband was a very athletic man and I am a very small woman. If you get hit in the face by a man like that, you see stars.
Thinking back, I could have lied to him, but I just could not do it when he asked me, "Did you go and see that young Moon today?" I always said yes. And he hit me. So one day he went to the kitchen, brought back a kitchen knife and said, "Okay. Today we will make a final determination. We will end everything now. I cannot stand this anymore."
I couldn't pray with my eyes open, so I closed my eyes and prayed to God: "I really believe that I have so many things I must do for You God, and for mankind." I was praying like that, and he swung the knife hard. But instead of hitting me, he somehow hit his nose, got a big cut and started bleeding all over his face. Of course, there was a big commotion. My parents accused me of being the cause of all the trouble.
My husband was also an expert basketball player. He would play basketball during all his free time. One day when he came home from work, I served him dinner. Then he said, "Okay, I'm finished, take away the dinner." So I did. Everything had been on the table, but when I looked again I realized that the bowl of rice wasn't there anymore. And as I looked around, he threw the rice bowl at me. But because I was a good runner in school, I quickly dodged, and the whole bowl smashed into the wall.
During the time of persecution within my family, Father knew that I was getting beaten. So every time Father sensed, "In Ju is getting beaten up again," he would assign one member to go to my house, stay outside, and start to pray for me. So when I looked outside, there was a woman standing praying for me. She was wearing a white Korean dress. And when I was getting beaten, I would look outside, see her, and get very inspired. Because of that, I would never even feel the pain. Afterward, angels came to me singing holy songs and really making me feel good.
One day I received a revelation from God saying that "if there is an elder who is persecuting you, and doesn't stop doing that, he or she will be paralyzed." Since my parents were elders, I told them my revelation. But my father would say, "How can you believe in a group whose God tells you that your father is going to be crippled and paralyzed?" But actually my parents didn't become paralyzed. However, another elder of the church who always told my parents, "Do not send your daughter to that new group because, it is evil" -- that person became paralyzed and crippled.
There also was a certain woman who was another source of my persecution. This was a Mrs. Do. She was my mother's friend and kept telling her, "your daughter will become very evil if she keeps going to this place -- Satan is possessing her." She became completely blind. She went to every hospital to try to fix her sight, but without success.
Many years later, my husband heard the Divine Principle from one of the professors of his academy in Korea, and after that he came home and said, "I realize for the first time that the Unification Church is not a false church. So all our children and everybody can now attend the church. "My second daughter is now blessed with Nicholas Buscovich.
In my personal life I went through much persecution and many difficulties, and I could withstand a lot of physical persecution and abuse. However, my first real temptation came through a materialistic thing.
When you get married in Korea, they give you a golden ring. So I got one, too. However a lot of my other friends received a diamond ring. I actually didn't know what a diamond ring was. I thought it was just a piece of glass, not so exciting. But then Satan appeared to me saying, "If you do not follow this man Moon any more, I will give you a diamond, and many other great things." But I realized that the happiness in my heart that I received from this man was so great. So I told Satan, "Even if you give me a diamond the size of Korea, you could not change the happiness I get from this man. And I will not leave this man, ever." Satan just took off, disappeared from me.
But he came again and said, "This time I am going to take your life." He had a knife and a gun. I told Satan, "Okay, just give me one chance to pray to God so I can send my spirit to Him." Satan agreed, and I started praying. When I opened my eyes he was gone.
I woke up and saw that my pillow was wet with tears and sweat because in my dream I was praying and fighting in a tremendous battle.
To end my testimony, I'd like to share with you a very important revelation.
It was in a dream. I was going toward a mountain, and on the way I saw the tracks of a tiger. So I knew there was a tiger nearby. I was very afraid to go on. But my older sister, who had come with me, encouraged me to continue. I reached the spot where I saw a very big, white ginseng root. It touched me, and I touched it, and it said, "Let's go together," so I followed the ginseng root. We came to a very big palace and suddenly the ginseng root turned around and became a wise old man with a very white beard. He said, "In the palace there is a very precious place and I want you to take a look at it."
When we arrived there, he said to me, "This is the Book of Life. Let's see if your name is there. He opened the book, and there was Kim such and such, etc. And he said, "Your name is also here, because you witnessed to Won Pil Kim."
And this is what I learned: Your name will be written in the Book of Life only after you have three spiritual children. That's why Father stresses so much that we need to have three spiritual children.
My sharing this with you is very important. Because I joined the church in the early times, I went through tremendous persecution and sacrifice. I couldn't participate in the providential benefit of the time which you are able to receive. Each of us has a cross to carry. So please persevere! If you endure, then you will receive the crown of victory from God, and your name will be written in the Book of Life.
Remember, I had an even heavier cross to carry than you and did not benefit from the time of the providence. Just have patience and continue on, even though it's difficult. Be like Joshua and Caleb. When they went to the Promised Land they never complained.
At the end, you will be victorious and your name will be written in the Book of Life. God bless you!