The Words of the Kim Family Before 2008
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The Words of the Kim Family Before 2008 |
Rev.
Byung Ho Kim
Ever since I joined the Unification Church I recognized that Father always gives us goals which are difficult for us to fulfill. Because of that, I always felt I was under strong pressure. If you ask any elder brother or sister, most of them will say their mission is very difficult. No one will say that it is light or easy. Although Father gives us difficult, heavy missions, I believe he doesn't want to make brothers and sisters feel oppressed, negative, or critical. He expects them to overcome the difficulties in order to finally receive love and respect.
In the early days of our movement we were always busy and in difficult situations. It seemed we were always carrying a heavy burden, and we could never stop. We had no opportunity to lie down or relax or be comfortable. Sometimes we felt angry when we encountered difficulties. For that reason, many brothers and sisters became tired, lost patience, and finally left the church. However, we tried to follow God's will and Father's directions as much as we could, and our movement kept growing. Just like water that becomes stagnant when it stops flowing, we can't afford to put down our burden and rest because we have such a great mission.
Since the Puritans came to America, American history and culture has developed continuously, moving from east to west. While history is developing, people tend to live diligent lives and be happy, but if development stops, then people's lives become stagnant; they become lazy, and finally, immoral.
Until the Second World War was over, Americans had no time to relax, because their history was developing so quickly. Until the end of the Second World War, Americans kept a pioneer spirit and lived according to a high moral standard. They often prayed to receive God's guidance and blessing. As you know, American people are proud of their pioneer forefathers who were always standing on the front line.
Americans moved west until they got to San Francisco, and then they went on to Hawaii. After Hawaii, they moved into the Pacific Ocean area, which is Asian area. Japan didn't like Americans moving into the Pacific Ocean area, so that's why Japan and America fought.
Motivated by the same pioneer spirit, Americans moved on to Korea and China. But as you know, after World War II, the communists set out to take over the world, and they finally moved into North Korea. Americans moved into South Korea. Thus, communism and democracy met in Korea. God's desire was that these pioneers should have continuously moved with the Christian spirit over that part of the world and taught even communists about God, the ideal world, and democracy.
Unfortunately, as a result of the Korean War, the movement of American and Western Christian culture was stopped in Korea at the 38th parallel. Like flowing water that meets an obstacle and has to start flowing backward, the democratic countries couldn't subjugate the communist countries, and communism moved downward into southern Asia and took over a lot of countries. In Vietnam, Americans got their first experience of losing a war. Until then, whenever Americans moved forward, God always helped the American people and they always won every war. If Americans had been victorious at the time of the Korean War, Christian culture would have continued to spread like flowing water and we could have proved even to communists that God exists.
Because the movement of American pioneer spirit stopped flowing, all kinds of strange cultural phenomena have been appearing in American society, such as dances like the twist, the hippie movement, punk rock culture. People do strange dances because they don't feel comfortable in their spirits; young people leave home because they are not happy there, and then even end up sleeping on the street. People even change the natural color of their hair to strange colors. People want to experience normal love and happiness, but if they can't, they use special medicines and drugs. Using drug- is not normal. This is a symbol of decay and decline. It is terrible how America is already spoiled.
Expressing
a true pioneering spirit on an IOWC team.
We have to understand one thing from all of this: Whenever religious people, particularly Unification Church members, are blocked by difficulties, we have to come out of that situation and move forward, other- wise we can become stagnant and corrupted.
In the Bible, we read that Jacob left his hometown and entered Haran, where he worked hard for 21 years. Because he worked hard and was so serving, finally he became rich and respected by his wives, children, and servants. Jacob could easily have thought after those 21 years in Haran that he had the right to stay there and enjoy his life with his wealth, his beloved children, and wives. However, when Jacob originally left his hometown of Canaan, he promised God that he would return. He didn't care about creating material happiness for himself and his family. He didn't feel he had time to relax and enjoy a comfortable life. He was always thinking about how to get back to his homeland. Because of this desire, although he had made a good foundation in Haran, he was happy to leave there. That strong desire had given him the determination to work hard, and to be prepared to leave at any time. When he left Haran, he was willing to give up all of his riches, and even his family. In his mind, his only concern was that Esau accept him. In this way, he was finally able to unite with Esau. The main lesson we can learn from Jacob's course is that he was victorious because he knew he could not be happy without God and without Esau.
A blessed couple once told me that because the Unification Church emphasizes home church, they wanted to move into their home church area, get an apartment, and do home church there. Together we discussed what to do. During our conversation, I realized that although it's a good desire to move into our home church area, if the motivation behind it is to become more independent from the church and enjoy a more comfortable and private life, then it's not so good.
I told this couple; "If you want to move into your home church area and find an apartment to live, and do home church there, that is great. Go and do it. But I have one suggestion for you. Why don't you share that apartment with some other brothers and sisters? I would be very happy about that. Move over, it would be very economical for you."
This couple, however, was thinking, "Must we live together with other people?" They refused.
There is often a gap between our ideal and our own physical, personal desires. According to the Divine Principle, we are to serve others and be sacrificial. My original mind has a desire to serve, to do home church, to do some good work. At the same time I have self-centered desires: I want to be comfortable, eat nice meals, and enjoy some privacy. I'm fighting within myself.
We need to think about the meaning of our principle life. We move into a home church area in order to be more sacrificial and live for the higher purpose of society and God. This is why Father gave the direction to move into our areas. It is written in the Bible, "God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son." By the same token, Father says that Unification Church members should move into a community area not to be served, but to serve people more directly.
I realized that this couple was not yet ready to be 100 percent sacrificial. Their idea was correct, and it seemed like they were following God's direction and Father's direction. But in their minds, they had some private purpose beyond just doing home church. It's not altogether bad to want to work for
God and serve people in a more independent way, but there is a very important reason why Unification Church members live together in the center.
What is the reason? When many of you first met the church, you may have thought, "Well, it's a great idea to live all together like brothers and sisters. I have been lonely all my life. Even when I was a child, my parents left me alone in my room. Unification Church seems nice. I will never be lonely again." Soon, however, you discovered how terribly difficult it can be to live together. When you lived in your family's house, you never fought with anyone, because your father lived in his own room, your mother lived in her own room, your sister lived in her own room, and you lived in your own room. You didn't fight because no one cared if you moved the desk or the bed.
In Korea, at meal times, you must never pass food over an elder person or show your back to them while they are eating -- it is terrible manners. But in America, in the Western world, I have noticed many times that members pass food over me and sometimes show their back side in front of my face. If you ever watch an Oriental movie, you will see that when people serve food, they leave the room backwards.
Rev.
Kim poses in front of a painting of Father.
If I lived alone, I wouldn't have to worry about others' manners. But because I live in a center together with many brothers and sisters, I have to digest and try to understand those things. Because we live in the center, we may create problems for each other. And more than that, because we have different racial and cultural backgrounds, and different languages, there are always problems and it is easy to have arguments. At first someone might say very politely, "It is my opinion that you are wrong." But when you get upset, you don't say anymore, "In my opinion..." You become very judgmental and get in a fight. If we did not live together we wouldn't have so many problems. But fortunately or unfortunately, we have had to live together.
Only in this way can we recognize that we have fallen nature. If you live in your private home, you can easily keep your fallen nature hidden inside forever, and you will never have an opportunity to clear it up.
I think I am quite a good man, and I believe my wife is quite a good woman, but sometimes we fight. Not because she is bad; it's because I have fallen nature and she has fallen nature. If we were not married, we would never see such fallen nature in each other. Because we are living closely together, I can see every small detail of her fallen nature and she can also see every bit of mine.
This is why married life is sometimes very difficult. When you notice your spouse's fallen nature, you cannot be patient or quiet. You feel compelled to point out, "Well, in my opinion, that is wrong." Your spouse will disagree. Who can judge? Fortunately, we have the Principle, which is from God, and it tells us clearly what is original nature and what is fallen nature and what is right and what is not right. Even if you get upset and emotional, you know you have to come back to the Principle. One good thing about married life in the Unification Church is that there is no divorce. Even if you get so upset at your spouse that you say, "I hate you. I never want to see you again," and you walk away one mile, two miles, ten miles, after some time you stop and think, "Well, I cannot go this way continuously. I must come back. I have no other choice because God said there is no divorce. This is for my eternal life." Then you begin to think how to negotiate with your spouse. Sometimes we have to kill our emotion even though we think we are right. In this way, if you come back and sit down with your spouse and try to negotiate, there will be some way to unite. This is married life.
In order to remove your fallen nature, you need people who can see your fallen nature with a microscope and can tell even when you have a wrong thought. Otherwise, your fallen nature will never be cured. Who can see your fallen nature so closely and correct it? This is your spouse, your son or daughter -- your blessed family. When we first start our family, we think we will harmoniously join together with our spouse and enjoy our family life. It is wonderful to think in this ideal way. But in fact, when you begin to live together, you will begin to see how each of you struggles with sin and fallen nature. You will fight with each other, then you will have to think about negotiation. Otherwise you cannot remove sin and fallen nature.
We live together in the center in order to live according to the Divine Principle. We have to practice how to love and serve others, how to solve Cain/ Abel problems, and how to negotiate with each other. Suffering and fighting together in the center therefore has meaning because we can pay indemnity. Indemnity means more than just having difficulties; indemnity is the way to remove fallen nature. We live together in the center because we want to remove fallen nature. In the Unification Church, we experience that before we are blessed we must bring out our fallen nature and be able to clearly see how terrible our own fallen nature is.
In the fallen world it is extremely difficult to bring unity between Oriental people and Western people and between white people and black people. We have to discover this clearly and then try to overcome these problems in our centers, and we are doing this. Some members may say, "We don't have any Japanese members in our center, so we don't have any problem," or, "We don't have any black members in our center, so we don't have any problem." It may be true that you don't have any problem about unity in a center like that, but you will never see your fallen nature. We have to have such a situation where we must overcome our fallen nature and love each other, especially before we receive the Blessing. After the Blessing, we can practice what we have learned in the center and in our home church area. The reason why I suggested to that a couple to rent an apartment but not live alone is because I realized they were not trained yet to be completely sacrificial and actually they wanted to enjoy a more private life. Therefore, I felt if they went that direction, soon they may lose their concern about home church and begin to follow their physical desires more than their spiritual desires.
If anyone goes in the direction of living a more private life, they may become more self-centered and individualistic. Sometimes, when members get a little money, they begin to want to enjoy their own private life. The result is the same as with many people in American society who get a little wealth. You may just fall away to a fallen lifestyle. I am worried about our members falling away like that. But if you live together with brothers and sisters in the center and train yourself well, finally you can establish a sacrificial way of life in your home church area and your spiritual children in your area will respect and love you. Then it will be difficult to be self-centered because people already respect you. Do you understand what I mean?
For example, while I am standing behind this podium, can I say bad things to you over the microphone? Can I say, "Go ahead and enjoy yourselves"? I cannot say that. I have to guide you with good suggestions and I myself have to practice a more sacrificial life. I like standing in front of brothers and sisters, because it makes me want to be more serious for God. While I am sharing the Principle with brothers and sisters, I feel I am becoming holy. On the other hand, if I share about any of my personal matters, I feel I am becoming self-centered.
In Korea, yesterday it was my son's birthday and so I made a phone call to him. When he was born, I was behind the Iron Curtain doing itinerary work. After he was born, I came back to Korea and I was with my son less than one year before I again had to leave Korea. He is now nine years old. Of course, I have been back several times, but I couldn't spend much time with him. I know that he is very bright and he is growing well and is healthy, but nevertheless, because I have a parent's worrying mind, it seems to me that he is not so happy, even on his birthday. I couldn't help feeling very sad about my son and thinking, "My son, are you happy there? My beloved son, if you are sad, then I am sad."
But as you know, according to God's will, I should think in a more principled way: "Heavenly Father, I will offer my concern for my family for the fulfillment of God's providence. I am very happy to serve you. I am trying to serve my Cain families. I will leave my son and his happiness in Your hands." If I can say that to God, then in that respect I am a good leader. I know I have to do that. But I tell you honestly, I had to stop and think, what should be my principled relationship with my son? If I begin to concentrate on my personal feelings toward my family, I may begin to lose the confidence to serve and sacrifice for others. That is natural. If we pay too much attention to our personal life or think of relaxing or enjoying our life, finally we become self-centered. I am afraid of this. Because you are listening to me, I tell you principled things, right? Please live more sacrificially and be more loyal to God. If the people in your home church area respect you for how sacrificial you are, you cannot let them down. Everybody wants to be self-centered and enjoy life, but we cannot do that. We must put ourselves in a situation to sacrifice and serve others. That is the way to save our spiritual lives.
I am concerned because as fallen people we have two different natures. One nature wants to follow the Principle. The second nature wants to follow physical, self-centered desires. Through my will, I have to push myself into the sacrificial position where I must serve others. Even though you heard Divine Principle, it is not enough. To follow this ideal we need will. We must have the determination to say, "Yes, I am going to be more sacrificial; I want to be a more valuable person and be a person of great love. Therefore, I will put my body in the position in which I must serve others."
We have the greatest example of this kind of heart and will in our True Parents. Once in East Garden before Father went to Danbury, he showed the leaders his legs which are often swollen, almost every day, because he is always standing. Father said, "I know that Unification Church members all over the world are working hard and praying hard and are not sitting down. Therefore, I always have the desire to stand up as much as possible and not sit down on a chair. That's why my legs are swollen."
Mother has the same desire. While Father was in Danbury and many brothers and sisters were praying all over the world, Mother didn't want to sit down or take any extra rest. She stayed up as much as possible.
Great leaders must practice will power to go that sacrificial way. All Unification Church members have to understand that even though we know the Divine Principle, we need a strong heart and will to practice the Principle and follow God's way. We cannot just naturally go this way because we are living in the fallen world and Satan is always trying to take our sacrificial desire away.
I want to share with you that no matter how many difficulties you have, you have the Divine Principle, you have the ideal, and you have your own will. Please follow the Principle way all of your life.