The Words of the Dickson Family
A Taste Of God's Unconditional Love
March 20, 2008
Hi brothers and sisters, I just wanted to share a precious experience God gave to me on our second weekend of STF super-challenge. I would first like to thank my team, my captain, and each of you for investing your heart on the Frontline.
My goal this condition is to trust God. So far, our 6th condition didn't turn out quite as I expected; an ankle injury from January continues to restrict me physically. I doubted whether I could bring substantial result for the team, whether I could even accomplish my internal goal, but through this situation God gave me a unique opportunity to trust Him. God was asking me to invest more internally.
I became desperate for God. I WANTED to trust in His direction and desire for my life, to let go and surrender to God, and to put God first - to love Him more than I love myself. I didn't want to always rely on my own power and ability, that stubborn independence.
Because my frontline time was limited to half a day, each run became so valuable to me. I didn't want my own concepts, emotions, or fear of failure to block God from working through me and with me, so the Fundraising became very focused -- investing my heart for God, looking for God, trusting God.
On Friday our captain Kayeon gave a morning service on "overcoming tests and challenges", conveying the point that you have to fight for God on the frontline. So I braced myself for the worst rejections that day, the most difficulty. I braced myself for a challenge but received the opposite. Everyone I met loved either the sun-catchers or the cause or both.
It was my highest run, but at the same time, I didn't have to do anything. Instead of gratitude though, I asked God why? Why was this blessing coming, what foundation did I lay today? I felt like I didn't deserve it. Maybe God was going to test my faith next run; can I keep going when nothing comes back? Or maybe He was going to give me a timeout for my ingratitude.
I set out on my second run, thanking God for the extra help in the morning, but even more desperate to find God, to know that He is there. I was ready for anything. But again, instead of indemnity Heavenly Father gave me love. One of my first approaches was a very stubborn, uninterested man who was determined to get "all or nothing". After an intense twenty minutes of investment I walked away from the small 'tiki' bar without my box -- he bought everything.
And I realized God's unconditional love, He doesn't want me to be unhappy. He doesn't get upset when we don't receive His gifts, when we don't listen to him calling out. All He wants us to know is "my child, I love you." I was desperate for God, but Heavenly Father was so much more desperate to show me his love. God is always with me, loving me, and he has such a beautiful plan for each of our lives- He wants to do everything together with us and there is no limit to His giving. All I have to do is trust, listen to my heart and allow myself to be led, to be loved.
Through learning to trust God, offering my heart and relying on God's power, and by opening up to receive His incredible love, I discovered something deeper; a desire to give God hope, to return His love, and to become trustworthy for God - taking responsibility not out of obligation or duty or because were 2nd Gen on STF, but out of joy.
Please believe in your goals, God gives them for a reason, and thank you again for fighting everyone. Let's give something wonderful to our parents in April.
Additional note from her team leader Kayeon:
Breakthroughs, internal and external all come upon the foundation of the conditions we set our sister Megan was setting conditions like crazy. Because she cannot fundraise for a full day she has decided to dedicate herself to loving the team whenever she isn't on the frontline. In between her runs she prays and studies and keeps a good frontline focus, always preparing to go out again.
She is always trying to do something public, like cleaning or getting ice or writing little 'Gods words notes' for her sisters, preparing product, cutting bookmarks, etc… she made all the conditions for God to be able to reach out and give her this experience. So let's all work hard for those breakthrough moments because Heavenly Father absolutely wants to give them to us! He's just waiting for us to make the right conditions for Him to be able to bless us.