The Words of the Kang Family
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The Words of the Kang Family |
Sun
Ae Kang
Mrs. Sun Ae Kang was born in Seoul in 1915. She graduated from Ehwa College in 1937. She lived during ci time when the role and value of women was changing in Korea. From girlhood, the issue of connubial love runs through her testimony like a red thread. She had married and had children when she joined our church without her husband in 1958. Thus, she represents one type among our early church pioneers. (The title is from Proverbs 28.1.)
I started worrying about problems in life and my future around the time of my graduation from the girl's high school I attended. From a young age, I lived under the shadow of my father's double life and of my mother's behavior. She dedicated everything including her time and love to caring for her parents-in-law and brothers-in-law. Seeing my mother persevering through so much without saying a single word made me deeply realize how pathetic her life was. Living in an era filled with questions about life, I worried because of my being a girl.
On the days that I walked back home in the same direction as my three closest friends, who lived in the same family environment as I did, we would say to each other, "Let us all go to Mt. Kumgang and become Buddhist nuns. Why marry if we are not going to receive love from our husbands?" as we sighed, pitying ourselves. As graduation day came closer, I made up my mind to study hard and live a celibate life, dedicating myself to learning.
After graduating from the girl's high school, I hoped to study in Japan but could not do so because my father became ill. I ended up going to Ehwa College instead. I first applied to the English Department, but my former teachers advised me against it saying that I would do better in the Department of Education because I was a girl. Some said there was no need to study English because war is coming between Japan and the United States.' Influenced by that, I decided to change my major to the Department of Kindergarten Teachers' Training two days before school started.
I started feeling closer to God as I prayed every morning during chapel. As a result, I preferred sitting on the grass, looking at the sky and whispering to God instead of hanging around with friends. As time passed, I completely immersed myself in this mystique and developed a close relationship with the missionaries. I regarded the efforts of the missionaries as noble as they transcended national barriers and sacrificed themselves to serve others. I felt myself being unconsciously attracted to them. Though I did not know a single verse of the Bible, teacher Maria Pak (the wife of Mr. Ki Bong Lee) separately taught me and two other students the Bible. Among the things I learned, I remember the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5 and hoped to live according to it.
This happened one night after graduation as I worried about finding a job: The skies were pitch dark and the North Star alone was shining. I saw a truly beautiful angel, wearing a white crown and fluttering white clothes, flying toward me. She said in my ear, "Do not worry," and then disappeared after leaving her verbal message. In those days, there were not many kindergartens, so finding a vacant position was difficult. However, God already knew about my concerns and sent his angel to let me know everything was going to be okay. This experience enabled me to realize that God exists, that he is omnipresent, loves mankind and is concerned about us. I also realized that angels are beautiful and are God's secret envoys.
I set celibate life and charity as my life mottoes and after being appointed to a kindergarten in North Hamgyong Province, I set out for Seoho. I thought that now was the start of my actual life, a time when I could practice what I had learned, and a time to practice my education as desired by Heaven. With this in mind, I washed the children's faces, clipped their nails and cut their hair. I taught them songs, dances and fairy tales, and how to fold colored paper. I played and danced with them as though I were a child myself and could realize what the verse, "unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven" meant. This realization added much joy to my life.
Soon after, I was instructed to take a new post at Ehwa Kindergarten. When I arrived at Ehwa Garden, I felt as though I were going back into my mother's embrace; it was heartwarming indeed. However, I had to take extra care of the children since they all had come from the wealthiest and best-known families in Seoul.
Every single day was the continuation of a happy life. At the young age of twenty-two, I had gained so much weight that my students' mothers would even say that I looked like a magnolia that had just bloomed. Heaven, however, gave me an ordeal and I had to be hospitalized with dermatitis at the age of twenty-three. While being treated, an injection I received caused infiltration of bacteria and I had to undergo two operations. I groaned on my hospital bed for six months.
While in the hospital, I underwent a positive change of mind toward marriage. After my discharge from the hospital, I married a man suggested by a couple I was close to. However, marriage life was not as smooth as I had idealistically expected. Marrying into a family running a first-class business, money became the enemy. The discord between my brothers-in-law and my husband's promiscuous life tortured me. After the birth of my first son, I tried hard to persevere and bring harmony within the family; however, my mind could not relax and I ended up feeling an even stronger attachment to my life of faith.
When my son turned one, we could get our own place away from my parents-in-law, where we tried to have an ideal family life. It was during this time that the Great East Asia Wars arose. Thankfully, we did not face any troubles eating or clothing ourselves because we were materially prepared, but all kinds of other ordeals came to us after that.
It
is a matter of utmost importance for me that I can lead the people
who hear my words onto the path of life. -- As a Peace- Loving Global
Citizen, p. 139
At the age of forty-three, I suffered from a serious illness and was bedridden as a result. This just aggravated my pain and sorrow. While I was lying sick in bed, Jeong Won Kang's mother and aunt came to visit our foster daughter-in-laws' and saw me. They seemed concerned after seeing me but on the other hand seemed happy. Jeong Won's aunt, Hwi Bong, used to be physically very weak too, but she now looked healthy and her face glowed. When they were about to leave, thoughts surged into my mind: I wish they could pray for me, and I should go to the Unification Church tomorrow. Hence, I sent someone to them asking them to take me with them to the Unification Church the next day. The next day, I woke up with a lighter heart in the morning and washed my face. After this, Hwi Bong arrived and together with the foster daughter-in-law, we got ready, took a taxi and headed for Cheongpa-dong. Once we went through the gate, I saw some of my Ehwa College alumni. The beaming images of So Dam Lee and Won Bok Choi were quite beautiful.
I went up to the second floor, sat near a heater and started listening attentively to Rev. Hyo Won Eu's lecture. As I listened, I completely forgot that I was sick and started experiencing miracles. It was as though pure water were scrubbing, washing, my head. My entire body felt as though it were being cleaned in the process. My body was so light; it felt as though I were riding a cloud. As my body cried in joy, I reached a certain dimension where I experienced a saying by Confucius "If one achieves body -- mind unity in the morning, one would have no regrets at all about dying, even the same evening."
After the lecture, I met Father. As soon as he saw me, he asked, "You have talents in liberal arts. What department did you major in?" I replied, "I graduated from the childcare department." Though it was the first time I had met Father, he looked familiar to me and seemed to be a man of integrity. I went back home with a completely recovered body. My entire family was surprised.
The next day, I went back to listen to the second half of the lecture. That was on January 29, 1957, the day of my resurrection. The lecture was about the start of history, its process and development. I realized that it is God who started history and God who has led history. I understood that history ran in accordance with a certain formula. This understanding resolved the questions I had about life and about history. My insecurities, fears and concerns disappeared, and joy completely filled me; I felt as though I were flying on a cloud.
On the fourth day, I unconsciously felt resurrected through Rev. Hyo Won Eu's lectures and made a donation to show my gratitude. Later, I went to meet Yun Bodhisattva under Hwi Bong's guidance. Upon seeing me, Yun Bodhisattva said, "You listened to the Unification Principle through teacher Eu. You were able to join the Unification Church because your ancestor, who lived five generations ago, was a good person.
You will not suffer even in the Unification Church and will only ride in cars." He told me that I would go witnessing in the southern part of South Korea first. I was quite surprised to find King Moon and teachers who had Eu and Ahn as their surnames mentioned within the Buddhist scriptures that Yun Bodhisattva was holding. I had lived in this world until the age of forty-three for my own happiness; however, I was determined to dedicate the rest of my life to Heaven and for God's will and to live my life in accordance with the church's instructions. I began dreaming of Father every day. In the dreams, golden light always radiated around Father. He wore a golden crown and white clothes. In other dreams, I thought God had appeared to me, until I realized it was Father. Thus, I could not doubt Father at all.
Two months after I joined the church, a member told me that Father is the returning Lord. I prayed about it until late at night over two days. The following day, I dreamt of Father standing in front of a podium in the National Assembly Building with a man of small stature standing next to him. I sat in one of the parliamentarian's seats and noticed that the wife of a former Minister of Justice and Won Gyu Kim, the wife of a former superintendent of schools, were sitting in a more inconvenient position than I. Then the small person standing next to Father pointed to Father and emphasized, "This man is the tree of life. This man, here, is the tree of life." Since we were looking for the tree of life, we could not doubt it at all.
One day, everyone had decided to go to Mt. Inwang during a particular event; however, I was a bit late and since I did not know the way, I ended up taking a nap at the headquarters church. I was quite surprised late that evening when Father came back and said, "You took a nap in the church." Since there was no way Father could have seen me taking a nap with his physical eyes, I concluded that he could only have seen me with spiritual vision. At times, I would be taken aback when Father would show that he already knew what I had dreamt of on particular days by asking me questions about my dreams.
Once during Sunday service, Father was giving a sermon titled "God's deep heart," and I somehow came to feel God's painful, sorrowful heart. I felt this surprising tug or sensation as though electricity had gone through my spinal nerves. I started sobbing. I felt so hot and warm as though my heart were on fire. In those days, people used to say that they experienced some kind of "electricity," "fire" and many other things that I did not truly understand until I experienced them myself. I realized that miraculous things happen when one becomes united in heart with God.
I
might be a tree that is buffeted by the wind and rain and scorched by
fire, but I would never be a tree that burns and dies. -- As a
Peace-Loving Global Citizen, p. 131
After this experience, I went beyond the level of an earthly life of faith and experienced being connected directly to Heaven. I ended up neglecting my private life. My heart toward Heaven became so intense that I became intoxicated with the will, diligently conducting a life of prayer and even leading a life of sexual separation from my husband.
One day, I had a dream; I went to a royal palace in the spiritual world and peeked in through the gate. I saw Father wearing a golden crown and a green-colored official robe. He was sitting. Behind him was a man wearing a colorful official robe. I saw a maid wearing a jade green top and asked her, "Please let me inside the palace." She replied, "Go and purify yourself one more time." Based on this, I understood that I could not get inside. I had to go away. When I told Father about this dream, he told me, "Please be careful to whom you tell these dreams." Upon hearing this, I tried to figure things out through prayer. As usual, I slept after prayer. In my sleep, I dreamed that I heard a voice saying, "You are Heaven's daughter. Live alone." Upon hearing this voice, I soon realized what my dream had meant.
After that dream, I asked for my husband's understanding in conducting a hundred-day prayer condition in order to start a solitary life. However, soon after that an issue of a magazine came out that criticized our church. My husband, started opposing and obstructing the church. Then to show him that it wasn't true, I started sleeping with him again. A few days later, I fell on the street and could no longer use my left hand.
I received electrotherapy for a few months to no avail. While suffering from this pain, I had the opportunity to be treated by a member who was an acupuncturist. My hand completely recovered after two acupuncture sessions. That is when I truly realized that I should no longer live a secular life. However, as days passed by, my husband completely refused to understand me. The situation worsened to the point that he threatened to kill me. I was so terrified that I could no longer live with him. Fortunately, I had the opportunity to go to Japan when it reached this point.
Missionaries
working in such extreme circumstances often received revelations
through dreams and visions. -- As a Peace-Loving Global Citizen, p.
165 (Father with the missionary to Japan that he sent Mrs. Kang to
assist, Rev. Bong Chun Choi who is better known as Sang Ik Choi or
Papasan Choi) [1]
On May 29, 1960, I left home at five in the morning and greeted Father before leaving. Father said, "Do not worry. Leave everything in God's hands and go.... A day will soon come when we can freely come and go. When you get there, you must first witness to your family and establish pioneering churches in four places. Please help missionary Bong Chuns Choi[1] who went to Japan as a stowaway two years ago."
I could go to Japan because my oldest son and a relative lived there. I felt that God had prepared all of this beforehand. My nephew's wife, her four-year-old son and I departed for Busan. We waited in Busan for a week before we received a telegram concerning our trip. I sent Father a letter saying, "I am going because it is God's will." At five o'clock that afternoon, we got on a small fishing boat disguised as an excursion boat and took off for Japan. Those waiting for the boat totaled fifty-three, and we were told to all squash inside the fish storage area. I could not imagine how I could fit inside, so I covered myself with a black cloth and lay flat on the deck.
One fishing boat from the direction of Japan came to us around dawn and gave us two baskets of rice balls. Afterward, they took us to an island, told us that we would be picked up the next day, and left. That night, I walked all the way up to the top of a mountain and slept with a pillow made of rocks just as Jacob had. The next day, we starved for the whole day as we waited for night to come. Around nine in the evening,
I went down to the coast and there heard the sound of an approaching boat. I ran down in joy toward the sound only to discover that it was a Japanese patrol boat. When an investigator from the patrol boat disembarked, he seemed surprised to see us. We were dragged to a police station, interrogated and sent to jail to await our trial. We were then tried, sentenced and sent to prison.
On the second day of my incarceration, my son paid me a visit. I was greatly disconcerted. My son was also a stowaway and was not supposed to be going around other provinces. Knowing what I was thinking, my son told me, "Mother, I registered the day before yesterday." When I heard that, I slapped the desk and burst out crying while shouting, "See! God is truly alive." The head of the prison himself seemed confused. He was quite taken aback because it was the first that he had heard of this, since registration had not been authorized.
My son filled out documents at the Immigration Bureau, through which he guaranteed that he would first go to Tokyo two days later to register as a student, take me on a sightseeing tour and send me back home at his own expense. After tilling out the needed documents, a lawyer submitted them.
I was released from prison with three years' probation. From the ordeal, I recall that whenever my handcuffs made clicking sounds, I would think of Father's course, feel gratitude and consider it a glory.
Once I went to Tokyo, I got an apartment and lived there with Bong Chun Choi, who was our missionary in Japan, and two single sisters. Members increased by the day. However, Missionary Choi had not told the members that the Principle had come from Korea. When the opportunity arose later, he confessed the truth to them. The members, in turn, replied that where the truth comes from does not matter; they would advance at the risk of their lives.
Because the members had united in heart, missionary Choi said he was invigorated a hundred-fold. As for me, I wrote down the revelations I had received until then and I sent them with the Divine Principle to the Japanese emperor. I supported the pioneering activities in four cities -- Tokyo, Nagoya, Osaka, and Kyoto.
After printing three hundred copies of the Divine Principle, I could no longer extend my stay and had to return to Korea. I arrived in Korea just after the 5.16 Revolution."' I was sure I would be arrested for having stowed away. Additionally, during the party's peak days,
I had been the head of Democratic Party Wives Association." I knew that a detective would certainly be waiting for me to arrive at Gimpo Airport.
I was immediately taken to the Korean National Police, Public Order Division, where I stayed up the whole night sitting in a chair. The next morning, while being interrogated, a certain person came to me and said, "I am in a tight position and cannot help you much, but I'll move you to the Yongsan Police Station. Go there and explain your situation well." Soon after, I was transferred to Yongsan Police Station. One cell there accommodated around fifteen prisoners and every single one of them was an opium addict. The next day, that same person came again and spoke with the commissioned officer. Once he had gone, I was treated completely differently and was released within three days.
our
out your dedication! Pour it out, even if you are sleepy. Pour it out
until you are exhausted. I kept repeating these phrases to myself. --
As a Peace-Loving Global Citizen, p. 136
That same year, I was assigned to lecture during the summer witnessing period in seven districts in North Jeolla Province and South Jeolla Province. I would be going to those provinces for the first time. When I went to say good-bye to Father before leaving, Mother gave me a handkerchief that Father used to wipe away perspiration. I realized her intention behind this, and set off for Geumsan [then] in North Jeolla Province. Not knowing the location of the church, I lashed my trunk to a frame and carried it on my back as I looked for the church.
The person in charge of the Geumsan church was Sun Rye Kim, who was living in a non-heated, cold room with no food at all and conducting only Sunday school. Seeing the difficult reality of pioneering life, we both cried together. I had to leave after having Sunday school with the children the next day. Each step I took felt heavy as I departed for Jinan. Among the members there, a few of the young women had joined the church through Gwang Cheol Hong. He was the pastor and he seemed trustable. I went up a mountain near Jinan and met a spiritual person that had piled up stones in the form of dual characteristics, three disciples, twelve disciples and seventy elders. He had also received revelations from Heaven and had compiled them in a book, but no one had been able to understand those revelations.
When I went to Jeonju, I met the mayor and conveyed to him the work we were doing. Immediately, he summoned the man in charge of reconstruction promotion and asked him to support our activities. The mayor gave us a signed pass that was of great help.
After touring the seven districts of Jeonbuk, I finally arrived in Gwangju. I went in search of the district headquarters and found it was a small makeshift wooden building. I heard that Seong Pyo Hong had used his university fees to construct the building, thus extending his college years.
I visited the mayor of Gwangju and requested his cooperation, showing him the signature of the mayor of the city of Jeonju. The mayor soon called his head of reconstruction promotion and asked him that we be given support. The mayor gave us his signature and even gave us public transportation discount coupons.
I took my trunk, walked down trails in the countryside and at times had to walk over steep mountains as I visited the different centers where our young members were. Whenever members met me, they were more pleased to see me than to visit for their own parents; they would reduce the portion of food they ate in order to keep some for me. They spread the word to their neighbors, causing them, too, to look forward to the lecture I was going to give. Whenever I saw the hard work of our members, I completely forgot my own fatigue and would speak all night long. I would have to rush to the next church area I was to visit as a result. At times, I felt physically drained, thinking of going over a mountain in the scorching heat. I would sit on the roadside and pray, which would invigorate me with power to go over the mountain. Sometime: I would become so overheated on the way that I would put my trunk down by a riverside and jump into the river in my underwear. I cannot describe the refreshing sensation of cooling my body down in the river.
Once, I had the opportunity to accompany Father in a car as he was heading to Jeonju with the leader of the Gokseong area. The happiness and gratitude I felt while accompanying Father throughout the long distance made me feel as though I were a child again. As we approached Jeonju, District Leader Hwang had ridden his motorcycle for some distance to meet us. When we met him, Father asked me, "Sun Ae, do you want me to buy you a motorcycle?" When we arrived in Jeonju, Father gave the driver W2,000 as a tip. I could not hide my surprise.
Once, I visited Hwaeomsa Buddhist Temple. There, I met and spoke to the temple's chief monk. We talked about whether a celibate life was necessary and about problems that arise when couples stop having sexual relations during spiritual training. We agreed on some points.
Mun Won Lee and a woman church member that I had met on the road travelled with me all the way from Gokseong to Jeju Island. Once on Jeju Island, Mun Won Lee introduced me to his nephew and we stayed at his place. When we went to the district church headquarters, the deacon was delighted to see us, prepared lunch for us and called all the members. We held a worship service with sincere prayers. Afterward, I paid visits to the mayor, the head of reconstruction promotion and the different heads of organizations. The police chief drove us in a jeep all the way to a hotel. He had called the hotel himself to request that we be well cared for. The next day, the head of reconstruction promotion picked us up in a jeep, gave us a tour of Jeju Island, explained to us the way that reconstruction promotion was being conducted and treated us to lunch.
Though I am inadequate, Heaven, out of concern for me, seemed to be sending me to places and instructing someone to come to my support so I would not suffer too much. I could experience Father's heart in this manner. Doing so immersed me completely in a hitherto unknown state of euphoria. For three years, I toured, here and there, all over Jeonnam.
People
who attended [our church] called one another shikku, or family
member. We were intoxicated with love. -- As a Peace- Loving Global
Citizen, p. 122 (Father with Unificationist shikku at Tongdo Buddhist
Temple in 1959)
On June 4, 1962, I helped as a staff member in the 72-Couple Blessing Ceremony and had the opportunity to read a written prayer during the event. Being a solemn event, my voice trembled as I read the prayer. My hands, which were holding the paper, shook to such an extent that I was deeply embarrassed.
On December 29, 1962, Hyo Jin was horn. I was in Jeonnam when I heard the news. I was so overwhelmed that I ran to the church in tears. After writing a congratulatory message, I participated in the joyous dedication day, which we celebrated with milk and seaweed soup.';
I was later assigned to be part of the arrangement committee of the 124-Couple Blessing Ceremony, which took place on July 24, 1963. Our time was completely absorbed with preparing the ceremonial robes and bedding for the 248 brides and grooms. We had to classify the ceremonial robes and wedding veils by size, which we had to check several times. Nevertheless, two hours before the Blessing Ceremony, a bride came to us saying she did not have a veil. It was already time for the rehearsal, which Father himself was conducting. I became frantic and hastily searched for one, to no avail. I finally fashioned one from the sleeves of a hanbok jacket just in time for the Blessing Ceremony. At that moment, all the fruitful results I had obtained through the forty days of hard work just evaporated. I felt as though I were going crazy.
After an intensive revival in downtown Daegu ended, I was instructed to stay in Daegu. Lecturers Jeong Hwan Kwak Jeong and Elder Jang and street evangelist Chan Bok also stayed in Daegu. Every single day, I went witnessing at Gyeongbuk University, Daegu University and Cheonggu University. I had Han Ung Jeong, who was in his second year of studies in the Department of Veterinary Medicine at Gyeongbuk University, rent a room close to his university's main entrance. I took students there to listen to lectures from lecturer Jeong Hwan Kwak. When students would ask me to talk to them in school, we would have discussions in a classroom.
At the end of the revival period, I organized a group with around thirty university students that had become members.
I decided to do a three-day fast out of concern for the group. I had hoped the group would naturally find stability. After the fast, the seaweed soup I was eating caused me great digestive problems. While I was writhing in much pain, Father suddenly paid a visit to Daegu. He was surprised to see the pain I was in and told me to go to a hospital. Later, Father was intending to give me some money through Rev. Yo Han Lee to buy a meal; however, weighing the possibility that I may not use it for food, Father instructed Rev. Lee to buy me a meal voucher instead. Having seen me eating rice porridge, a student named Myeong Hwa Kim, began making a big, boxed lunch at home that she brought to me every day.
On January 29, 1965, Father set off on his first world tour.
I was planning to get some rest and to take medication during Father's absence from Korea. However, I received a request from Mrs. Ji Seng Ryeon, wife of Gi Seok Lee, who was the leader of our Gangwon District, asking me to convert into full members some people they had witnessed to that were in their prime years. I headed to Chuncheon as soon as I received the request. The church was in a good location and was a big building. I heard about the sacrifices that were made for the building to be acquired. Rev. Gi Seok Lee purchased the building through money he had saved running a cafeteria in a girl's high school and through cutting expenses by eating only rough bran for some months even though it caused him to sometimes vomit blood. I feel that might have been why I felt so much grace and inspiration once I entered the main worship auditorium.
Every day, I met guests that had been witnessed to, conveying the word and having discussions. Seng Ryeon, Mrs. Jeong Sun Choi (the district director of the Red Cross) and I harmonized well, and we earnestly prayed to Heaven for the restoration of Gangwondo. With this earnest desire, we conducted our activities, having lunch at Jeong Sun Choi's place and two other meals of brown rice that we ate with kimchi and red pepper paste. Though our circumstances were very tough, the district leader's life was even more impoverished. Though Seng Ryeon was pregnant, she ran both a cafeteria and the church.
One day, Jeong Sun Choi and I paid a visit to the governor of Gangwondo, who had once listened to a lecture during one of our lecture tours conducted across Korea. Because he was very busy, we were allowed only three minutes to convey what we wished to do. We strongly requested permission to give a lecture to the public officials working in the Provincial Hall. We told him we felt this was very important. Fortunately, the governor easily accepted. We were completely overjoyed.
During the national revival tour, I followed Su Won Chung and Hyeong Gwan Ahn. Our Jeong-seon District in Gangwon Province was the least accessible place we had to visit. We walked up one mountainous trail that was reputed to be a dangerous trek in the winter, but I followed the trail without much difficulty. The members in that church diligently participated in activities while eating only rice mixed with corn. Their dedication moved God who was certainly dwelling with them. It was there that I witnessed to my spiritual son, Won Gun Pak.
After the difficult tour, I went back to the headquarters church. I had planned to filially take time to recuperate and begin taking medication, but Mrs. Seng Ryeon Ji came to look for me again. Once again, I had to visit our Gangwon District.
1 He was born in 1925 as Sang Ik Choi. At the age of two, his family moved to Japan, returning when many Koreans were forced to repatriate in 1945, at war's end. His father gave him the name Bong Chun when he was in his twenties. He saw some significance in the name after joining our church in April 1957 and thereafter adopted it. As a missionary in Japan, he went by the name Masaru Nishikawa.