The Words of In Jin Moon from 2010
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The Words of In Jin Moon from 2010 |
1. In Jin Nim began by greeting everyone, announcing that True Parents are on their way. She encouraged everyone to participate in the Monday night event and show them how much we love them.
2. We are privileged to have them in our lives.
3. As In Jin Nim was thinking about the message she would give to us this morning she came across several e-mails. This is the start of the Christmas holidays and parents are running around trying to get everything done, preparing to have a great time together with their families. This is a great time for families, but also a sense of urgency and desperation, wanting to get it right. Children have high expectations and we don't want to fall short, we want to be a super mom.
4. The e-mail In Jin Nim received was from a lovely lady with a beautiful family, on the process of going down the road of motherhood and self discovery, trying her best to balance work and family, dealing with the rigid schedules, at the same time trying to be flexible for her family, her spouse, and relatives.
5. This is an accomplished woman, very capable in her job, but just like many of us who have children, she wanted to be a super mom, an action hero type of person, in 10 places at the same time -- if her child falls on their knees -- she is right there. Before her child runs home, distraught because of something at school, she is there at the front door with cookies.
6. This is the image of motherhood we put on ourselves. But this mother was severely, severely burned out. She was trying to live her life for the sake of others, going out of her way to take care of everyone around her, and she didn't realize that she had forgotten to take care of herself. So, she found herself in a state of panic with the holidays approaching, all the relatives coming, many expectations she wanted to fulfill -- it was a senior pastor SOS e-mail.
7. When In Jin Nim read the e-mail, she reminded In Jin Nim of what she used to be like. Sometimes, when growing up, when they (she and her siblings) wanted to be their best, many times they wanted to be nonhuman, a superhuman. They didn't realize how precious and special they are.
8. Instead of learning to appreciate who we are and then taking the next step, we keep taking step after step without taking the time to appreciate the preciousness of who we are as divine sons and daughters. When we forget to remember the divinity within, how special and precious we really are, having been given this opportunity called life to really make something beautiful, to leave something beautiful behind in this world. We can so easily degenerate into thinking that we are a worthless piece of garbage, "I don't mean anything to the world."
9. In Jin Nim found herself in that situation many times when she felt like she was going out of her way to take care of everybody, but when she was by herself she felt incredibly worthless. She asked herself, what is the meaning of life, when I'm feeling tired and burnt out all the time. That is when a lovely voice in the back of her mind came up in volume, it was the voice of her mother. It was her mother reminding her what a beautiful child of God she is, that she is a divine being.
10. When In Jin Nim was a child, one of the things her mother encouraged the children to do -- many times they had to follow True Father on his speaking tours and their toys were left behind -- they would come to their mother and asked if they could go out to play because father was giving a long speech. And sometimes she would let them go out and play -- and they would play but then they would come back to their mother and tell her they don't have their toys, their favorite things and they wanted to go home.
11. Their mother used to tell them the same thing over and over again. She said, "But you have so many toys." And they said, "Mother we have no toys." And she said "Yes, you have so many toys." They looked at her wondering if she had gone bonkers or if she was telling them something profound. They had not brought anything. But she told them, you brought yourself. She asked them, "What about all those friends, all those toys I've seen you drawing, creating, making up in your mind, the stories that you wrote and love to read to your bothers and sisters? Aren't they all your playthings, your toys? You have lots of toys now go play."
12. They would go out thinking that this is a call for them to write the stories or to draw, but what she wanted was for them to take stock of who they are. Here they are in the middle of a long speech by True Father and they want to go out and play with their playthings, things that they are familiar with. What their mother was saying -- she did not use the word imagination, use your creativity to amuse yourself, create your own things, create the toys you want to play with, but that is exactly what she wanted them to do.
13. She was challenging them to not complain. If you don't see what you want, you are a divine being. As long as we can tap into our ability to create, to imagine, she was indirectly telling the children that you can creatively take yourself out of the situation that you're in. If you find yourself in a situation where you have no toys, with the ability of the divine within, with the ability to imagine, with the ability to create, we can create our own personal playthings that we have a hand in making.
14. From a very young age In Jin Nim's mother encouraged them to see, not only what they don't have, but how to create something out of nothing, something better than what they had before, that can amuse them for endless hours and keep them entertained.
15. When In Jin Nim thinks about the sister who was totally burned-out, overcome by the weight of the world, overcome by the things she had to do, who felt crushed and demoralized -- In Jin Nim sees herself in that woman -- at various moments in her life she was there, she was exactly that superwoman want-to-be -- she realized the simple message that her mother said to her many years ago, this message about imagination, our ability to create, to get ourselves out of the rut we are in because we have the ability to imagine.
16. This was when In Jin Nim started thinking -- a lot of great men and women have done just that. Lots of great men and women have been born to die of poverty, with very little prospects. In a way they were born to a life of misery, to certain death, or certain failure. But these people, somehow by tapping into the divine, by understanding or discovering God along the way, realizing that they have infinite potential to be the kind of people that they would like to be -- they realized that by understanding who they are, that they are God's children, and realizing that they have been given this divine gift, the ability to imagine, to dream, to visualize. These people who seemed like they were set for certain failure, picked themselves up by the boot straps and turned themselves into great men and woman of the world. It is because, regardless of what the situation was, they were able to exercise this creativity, this ability to imagine through dreaming, the ability to visualize what you want and start implementing that visualization into something real, something substantial in their lives so that they could be the kind of people that they wanted to be.
17. For example a great athlete like Michael Jordan already knew what he wanted to be. He visualized what he wanted to be. Regardless of what dire circumstances or obstacles were in his path, nothing stopped him.
18. The same goes for our True Father. He was born in the remote hills of North Korea to become one of the great religious leaders and the True Father of mankind. At a very, very young age, even with nothing to his name, he knew exactly what he needed to do. After being anointed by Jesus Christ at the tender age of 16, when Jesus Christ asked him to fulfill his mission.
19. And what was that mission? That mission was for Jesus not to have been crucified on the cross, but to live and find that wife, become the True Parents of mankind, establish a true family, be a great model and guide for humanity in helping them realize in every man and woman regardless of where they come from or what their backgrounds might be, that each and every one of us has an incredible personal destiny we need to fulfill and substantiate in our lifetime. This was the message that was given to our T Father.
20. Ever since he was 16 he visualized, he dreamed, and imagined what he needed to do and one at a time he put it into motion.
21. When In Jin Nim thinks about this woman, or about herself, being in this rut wanting to be a super mom, being there for everybody, but not having the physical means to do so, she often found herself hitting against a brick wall. That is when she realized her mother's wisdom again, her mother's wisdom nugget, imagine yourself out of the situation. She has taught In Jin Nim a lot of lessons along the way, but one of the simple lessons that she encouraged the children to do -- when she encouraged them to dream and visualize and imagine, she would say "Children, remember to breathe, you have to breathe."
22. In Jin Nim would say to herself, as she would say to that superwoman wana-be, we have to stop what we're doing and take a moment to breathe.
23. We go about our day doing so many different things, we just don't realize that we are not exhaling all the time or inhaling all the time, but there is this give and receive action that is taking place with us and the universe. We are inhaling and we are exhaling 20,000 L of air a day.
24. Just as we give and we receive, just as we live for the sake of others and we go and go and go for the sake of others, there has to be a moment when we are giving, giving, giving, but also when we are breathing in.
25. When we feel totally confounded by this mountain of work, by the weight of the holidays approaching us, we have to imagine ourselves out of our rut, out of this super mom wana-be conundrum. In Jin Nim's mother always encourage them to breathe, to stop, to rest, to take stock of where you are, to feel yourself as a human being, not just as a robot, someone who just facilitates things in the home, someone who executes the things that need to be done in the course of the day, but to remember ourselves in our simplest state of being, simply inhaling and exhaling.
26. And then she would encourage them to take stock, rest a little bit, just like at the end of a long day when we sleep before we are ready, healthy, and glowing for the next day. So we rest and take stock, and just as beautiful photographs, regardless of how beautiful we take them, they still need to go through the process of traveling through the dark room. They have to enter a dark room, a quiet place, where different solutions await these photographs before the pictures can be brought out on the photographic paper for all of us to enjoy.
27. Likewise human beings, all of us, regardless of how faithful we want to be in our lives, we can always be exhaling, exhaling, exhaling, sooner or later we need to inhale. We need to rest. We need to take stock of where we are.
28. The next thing we need to do is to visualize what we want. Have an image in our mind of where we want to go. The super mom in the rut needs to take a moment, maybe spa for three hours, and take a moment to think about her day, and that she can only get 9 of 10 things done, so be it. Maybe a glorious relative of hers might come and pick up the last piece and make it into a glorious holiday.
29. We always try to do everything ourselves and think the world is going to fall apart if we are not there. In Jin Nim doesn't know how many times as a mother, her children wanted her to figure everything out for them. Many times they would ask her questions, "Mother what should I do about this? Should I go to Boston for this, or Chicago, or New York? And you know that the child already knows the right answer, but they are making you give them a command as to what you want them to do.
30. As we mature in our motherhood what we do more and more is to allow the children to think through their own questions and arrive at the answer themselves. Many times, even at HSA, people who work for In Jin Nim send her long e-mails asking obvious questions they already know the answers to, she simply will not respond. They know the answer, they've thought about it, they will come to the conclusion, and they know the answer they will arrive is the answers she would like to see. But sometimes you want to take a shortcut. You want someone in a position of authority to say "Okay you can do the easier way." But when you thought it through you realize that the answer is obvious in your question, so a wise mother will sit back and allow you to answer your own questions -- and many times In Jin Nim does the same at HSA.
31. When In Jin Nim remembers her mother, asking all the children to wait and take stock -- she was very good at not answering all the questions. She was very good at having the children think it out, work it out, learn to walk on their own.
32. When the lot of them grew up, they were not the most malleable group of children. Because their mother encouraged all of them to have opinions and think their way through, feel their way through. They had different ideas, different plans, different goals, and coming together as a family was a very difficult thing, but what she did was incredible in that she has created a family of very, very different types of people. In a way they represent all the different character types, all different shapes and forms, so when they come together it is like the world of different nations coming together. We are not like, as when you create a cookie-cutter and all the cookies are the same.
33. Her mother raised them in such a way that she appreciated their own unique gifts. She allowed them to tap into their divinity, their ability to create, to imagine, and to dream. We will do so, no matter how difficult the obstacles are in their path, for that In Jin Nim is eternally grateful to her mother.
34. So here she is, imploring all of them, as the first step in the course of this process of imagination, to rest, to breathe, to take stock and look at what you need to do. Don't be so afraid, overburdened, feeling demoralized, it's just another process in this road of life.
35. Then she would ask them, and encourage them, to visualize where they want to go, what they want to be, just as Michael Jordan could visualize exactly what he wanted to be. We all have the ability to be successful, to be loved, to find incredible love, to prosper in things that are emotionally wonderful and physically wonderful, as well as spiritually wonderful. This is what God wanted for all of us and many times we are our own restriction, with patterns of negative thinking, telling ourselves we cannot do that, I'm not tall enough, we can't do that, I am not fast enough, can't do that.
36. These are the restrictions we put on ourselves. If we can dream, if we could visualize, if you see it in your mind, then we can make it happen in our lives.
37. In Jin Nim's mother would push them to rest, get healthy again, then start visualizing, dreaming, start having goals and aspirations that you would like to see happen in your life. Then she encouraged them to do something about it. To implement it, go about it.
38. In Jin Nim realized that when we as human beings go about our business and our lives, there are many, many ways we can change or better our lives. This imagination process can take place in the confines of our own room, we can start changing our whole understanding of our family, ourselves, of our world, or we can make a breakthrough discovery as many scientists have done and change the world.
39. When In Jin Nim thinks about something as tiny as, for instance -- this great American poet Emily Dickinson (In Jin Nim is a huge fan of her poetry -- see "Quote For the Week" below for the complete poem which In Jin Nim refers to "The Gentian weaves her fringes") she was a master in mixing comedy and satire, dealing with the themes of death and immortality which runs through all her works. She wrote a fantastic little poem many years ago, and here was this slight, frail looking woman, who was quite a recluse in her life. Toward the end of her life she never left her room. Even the friendships that she had were all through letters, so she was very much a person who lived within herself, but she wrote this fantastic poem.
40. It is a parody on the Trinitarian notion, for the understanding of baptism. In the Good Book, Matthew 28:19, Jesus implored all his brothers and sisters to baptize all the different nations in the name of the Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost. That was kind of like Jesus urging all his brothers and sisters to share the good news of Jesus wherever they go.
41. We hear this all the time being repeated. What Emily Dickinson did was incredibly charming, intelligent, but also incredibly poignant. She took the scriptural text in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost, and she wrote a poem using the same form, the same beginning and ending, ending it with Amen same as the Matthew verse.
42. What she did was she totally changed the nouns that she used and therefore changed the whole feeling of this concept of Trinity.
43. She was a very well educated, well bred woman, and very well-versed in the knowledge of Scripture. In Jin Nim is sure that she, as a woman, many times, approached this life of religion, as many woman, sisters, mothers have done, including herself. Here we have this concept of baptism, and the way we baptize all those different nations of the world is by issuing this statement in the name of the Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost.
44. In Jin Nim is sure when Emily Dickinson, when she read these lines, must have asked the question, "Where do I fit in? Where is the mother? Where is the daughter? Will the Holy Ghost have a form? Will it be male or feminine?" When In Jin Nim hears those words, that's what's going through her head. And when In Jin Nim sees different sisters and mothers and woman of the world read those words, In Jin Nim knows they feel exactly the same thing.
45. The concept of the Trinity for lots of woman is a very cold concept, very archaic, very patriarchal, very male masculine base concept. There is no mother, there is no sister, there is no warmth. What Emily Dickinson did is she rewrote this with a hint of parody, and lots of literary criticism actually said, "with a hint of blasphemy." What she did was she replaced the three nouns, the Father, the Son, the Holy Ghost. She replaced the Father with -- in the name of the bee (as in a buzzing bee), she replaced the son with the word, in the name of the butterfly. She replaced the Holy Ghost with the word breeze.
46. Emily Dickinson's version of the call to baptize the world, in the name of the bee, the name of the butterfly, and in the name of the breeze, amen.
47. What she has done, which can be taken as blasphemous, but you must understand she is writing with a sense of comedy, a sense of parody. She is provoking us to think, to visualize this call to baptism and understanding and look at it in a totally different way. She is saying, this is what we are called to do, to baptize the world, "but you know I'm feeling a little lack of the feminine spirit here." "What if I were to use words that come from mother Earth, that come from the things we experience, and instead of these strains of the Trinity as something archaic and patriarchal, what about bringing symbols of spring into this Emily Dickinson version of scriptural text -- by bringing symbols of spring, of new life, like bees." You see bees in the springtime going from flower to flower. You know the winter has melted, it's time for new life, you know it's time for flowers to spring, for pollination.
48. And she brings in this beautiful concept of butterfly. We see butterflies flying around -- the symbol of beauty, something that is light, fairy, but so inspiring at the same time, something that moves. Like when we are moved we feel that we have butterflies in our stomach. We feel something.
49. This concept, "in the Father" we don't have any sensory experience. We have the words the Father, the Son, the Holy Ghost, but none of these words are sensory experiences. Whereas in Emily Dickinson you have the concept of spring, the bee the butterfly, the breeze. And you know the bee is buzzing, you actually hear it. You know the butterfly is fluttering. You can see the butterfly fluttering. And you could feel the breeze that is caressing your skin, that is caressing everything about your being.
50. What she is visualizing in this lonely quiet room that she allowed herself to be confined in, she is seeing a whole new way of understanding religion, something that is different from the old understanding of just this male dominated concept of Trinity. Where the Holy Spirit, the feminine, has no form. What she does is she spins it around and brings in the feeling of spring, the sensory experiential things, themes. And she leaves us with the last word, the breeze -- it can be a noun and it can be a verb as well.
51. There is this feeling of movement that will make it, not just the old understanding of the Trinity, but understand it as something that is experienced through nature, appreciated through mother Earth. It is a different way to be more in tune with where we are and who we are. In Jin Nim feels that Emily Dickinson wrote this little poem because she was yearning for the feminine, for an understanding of where she fit into the universe. At the same time in this beautiful, seemingly sweet poem, that you don't realize you got stoned by, because it is so charming. When you first read it it's so charming you don't realize the sting of this charming poem until you're done reading and thinking about it. This sting is there to provoke us to think of something that is missing in this concept of the Trinity.
52. Emily Dickinson was dealing with something that all woman have to deal with in their life of faith. That is why, for In Jin Nim, sharing this breaking news with the world that the True Parents are here is an incredibly profound concept and reality for her. Because, just as Emily Dickinson was toying with the idea, bordering on the limits of blasphemy, to really tackle this question of where do women fit in, as mothers and daughters. In Jin Nim has felt the same way, and woman of the world have felt the same way. But with True Mother in place, in this form of the True Parents, this is incredible breaking news in that we feel represented, we feel validated, and we know that we can be great woman of God just as our fathers and our brothers can be great men of God. And that is a great blessing for all of us, brothers and sisters.
53. When we are thinking about our True Parents, welcoming them in our midst tomorrow, we are mindful that many times we go about our way and we lose sight of how precious we are, because of all the things that are going on, because all the static that is going on. But if we, just as that supermom want-to-be, take that moment to take a rest, take a breath to inhale and exhale, realizing that regardless of what situation she is faced with in her life she can always visualize and dream her way out. She can be the agent of her own changed life. She can make the decision, to say this is what I would like to see happen and then implemented, and go about it and make it happen each and every day.
54. As we approach the holidays, as we are burdened with lots of different things going on, please rest assured that our Heavenly Father is with you always, and the most incredible thing in our lives today is the fact that we have our True Parents here with us.
55. No matter where we are in life, no matter how frazzled, how demoralized we might feel, if we always come back to the center, or to the things that are simple in our life of faith, which is our love for God, our Heavenly Parents, and our love for our True Parents who are with us here, working with us each and every day. Then from that starting point, from that core, as long as we believe in ourselves, and as long as we remember we are this incredible precious divine being that can be the agents of our own changed lives, we have the ability to be anything that we can dream ourselves to be.
56. We have the ability to accomplish everything that we visualize ourselves accomplishing. In a way all the things that make our lives seem hopeless, impossible, goes away when we stop, rest, and give ourselves that room, in that dark room, of your bedroom or your prayer room, or in a moment of silence, to realize how special we are and allow ourselves to exercise our blessed given ability to dream, to visualize. Because then everything that we can see in our lives can become a reality.
57. So when our True Father preaches to the world that the peaceful world that we are awaiting, is right around the corner, In Jin Nim very much believes that. And he has often said "We are holding a peaceful world within our hands." In Jin Nim is a firm believer of that. If we can work on ourselves, take the time, while living for the sake of others, to take care of ourselves so that we are always ready for the next day. So we are always ready to see that face of love, which at times can come at us -- instead of a caring organic person coming at you -- sometimes they come at you loudmouth, L. Organic living, definitely, "O." Vituperative, "V" they just want to fight it out with you. And "E," incredibly energized bunnies wanting to do battle. This is how sometimes our loved ones come at us; like loudmouth, organic, vituperative, energized love bunnies ready to do battle.
58. In Jin Nim knows how the supermom feels, like here come my love number one -- loudmouth, organic, vituperative, energized love bunny number 1 child. And here comes love number 2, and sometimes you feel absolutely overwhelmed. But when we do, just as True Mother reminds us, remember to give yourself time to again imagine, to be creative, to dream again. Take that step back, close the door, go into the bathroom, say "do not disturb mommy for five minutes." What In Jin Nim used to do, even in the bathroom her children would find her, so she would go into her closet. Her children would say "mommy come out of the closet." But that was how In Jin Nim found her dark room, her space. We all need that.
59. In Jin Nim remembers different sisters that she spoke with, saying how could you do that, how can you give yourself five minutes like that?, you need to live your life for the sake of others, you have to give everything. Many times In Jin Nim took their advice, but she found that she was dying for the sake of others. She was no good to anyone, not even to herself. That is when she went back to listen to the voice in the back of her mind, her mother, saying "breathe child, breathe, inhale, exhale, rest." So now her children know when she says I'm going into my closet -- that means mommy had it tough day, so just chill until mommy comes out and she will be a much better mommy.
60. They have this understanding in her family, and people can laugh about it or joke about it, but it works for them. She wants to encourage mothers and fathers and brothers and sisters to find your own closets. It's okay. And give ourselves the space to take care of ourselves, because when we do, we can give more, and more, and more.
61. In a beautiful community that we call our own, people are so different, so beautiful, but very different. As we celebrate our time with True Parents tomorrow let's try to come together in this revolution of heart, in this understanding that we have something precious, really, within our midst. And despite our differences, just as that tiny little woman from Amherst Massachusetts started something in a very few lines, that moved the hearts of lots of young women, and lots of young woman literary students all over the world, just as much as she affected In Jin Nim. When In Jin Nim read that poem it moved her immensely and she started dreaming of a life, and the life of faith, where woman were duly and honorably represented, and for In Jin Nim, to experience it unfold in her lifetime, through the great work of True Parents and through the beautiful simple elegant work of our True Mother, it is an incredibly, incredibly exciting time for this student of religion.
62. As we come together as a community let us put aside our differences, and realize that, just as that tiny woman started a revolution of heart, because she provoked us to feel what we thought about God, what we thought about Jesus Christ, and we thought about the Holy Ghost. In a way our True Father and our T Mother also want us to realize and feel who we really are, and how, what a great opportunity it is to live our lives honoring God and True Parents and each other, and in so doing usher in a great and loving peaceful world that we all so want, that we all so long have dreamed. But once we know we can visualize it, we know that that reality is within our hands.
63. Brothers and sisters, as we come to the end of this year we need to think what this year was all about. To think that we are coming to the end of another year together, with our True Parents, where we are actively participating in the making of an incredible history. Not just history, but providential history. It's an incredible time for all of us.
64. Brothers and sisters, have a beautiful Sunday, just as Ben sang so lovely before the sermon -- "every time you wake up you are so beautiful to me." This is what God is saying to all of us, "Take your rest child at night, and then the next morning when I see you, you are so beautiful."
65. That is how God sees you, that is how True Parents see you, that is how the True Family sees you. "So, you beautiful people, we have a lot of great work to do, right?" But True Parents are coming, so what are we going to do? We are going to give them the greatest round of applause and let them feel our love, let them feel the spring dawn on America. Let them experience, not just the beauty of the bee and the butterfly, let them feel the breeze, the caress, the love, and the care that we are sending their way. Can we do that brothers and sisters? Thank you!"