In Jin Nim and Heung Jin Nim On True Parents and Our Movement

November 1981

Un Jin Nim

Our True Father has talked with us on hundreds of occasions, explaining many aspects of God's heart and providence. On very rare and precious occasions,

Mother has also spoken to the members. However, most of us have not heard True Children speak and do not know much about their concerns. While their parents are away, True Children have set a 120-day condition, praying together every day at 7:00 a.m. and 7:00 p. m.

In 1980, Ye Jin Nim organized a blessed children's workshop; a second one this summer included not only listening to lectures but also street speaking and fundraising. Recently, New York members were really moved to hear Heung Jin Nim and other children witness directly to Father at the corner of 34th Street and 8th Avenue. On another occasion, Kwon Jin Nim visited a corner table witnesser and gave his heart to try to get a man to come and hear a lecture. The member who observed this resolved to learn from his example of investing all one's being to bring one person back to God.

When Father and Mother were visiting Camberg, Germany, recently to give the matching and Blessing to our European brothers and sisters, three of the True Children were with them. On the final day of the visit, June 15, Wolfgang Waldner looked for Heung Jin Nim, whom he had met and accompanied on a previous visit to Europe.

As they were talking, Wolfgang explained that his most recent mission was contacting theologians and trying to explain to them about basic points of Divine Principle. "I thought this would be a good chance to record True Children's views about their parents," Wolfgang recalls. He says he will never forget his experience that day. In Jin Nim and Heung Jin Nim poured out their hearts for about an hour and a half, on a variety of topics. Bit by bit, other members drew near to listen as well.

The following excerpts from the tape-recorded conversation do not really do justice to the emotions that In Jin Nim and Heung Jin Nim were expressing. Words, after all, can be rather cold and formal. On the tape, it is clear that most of the time they were in tears, and that their general tone was one of pleading.

Sixteen and fifteen years old respectively, they are still in the stage of learning and experiencing many new things. In their position, they have a unique perspective on True Parents, but you can also imagine their loneliness, resulting from the public life that True Parents have always led. Also, they must feel much pressure at school and even from our members, because of what their Parents represent. I hope that through reading the following transcript, our members can sense something of their heart.

Heung Jin Nim: The heart of every child longs to be with his parents all the time. We have a certain position, but nothing comes easy, even though we don't have fallen nature and we were not born with original sin. That is more than we could have asked for. Still, we have to go through many problems and difficulties in life during our growth stage, just like Father and Mother, until we become perfect. We don't expect always to receive; we want to understand and give.

In Jin Nim: Sometimes I feel jealous in a way of members who spend more time with True Parents. To feel jealousy and lack of love is natural for every child. But the mission is more important than our lack of love. Father loves us very much, but he loves the members more. He will not live here forever, so since he loved you more than us, then you will love us. Father does not look just at the present; he is constantly looking towards the future, thinking of the next generation.

Heung Jin Nim: My sister's matching (Ye Jin Moon) marked the beginning of the second 21-year course. Therefore, we have to go through a lot of faith difficulties and problems, but we must achieve this perfection.

In Jin Nim: I don't have so much time to have experiences with True Father. I don't try to communicate with Father externally, but mainly spiritually. Father is more than just a father for me; he is also the messiah. So my way of relating to Father is not the same as other people relating to their fathers.

Heung Jin Nim

Heung Jin Nim: Very rarely does Father talk to us as a father to his children.

In Jin Nim: So therefore, we feel closer to spirits than to real people.

Heung Jin Nim: Most of the time, True Parents are with the members. Their mission is much more important than just being with us.

In Jin Nim: Even though they really love us from their heart, they are always putting us aside and giving other people more love. Anyway, I don't feel lonely, because Heavenly Father is always with us.

Heung Jin Nim: True Parents are our father and mother, yet they are very apart from us. We don't know our parents, so to speak. Members who have been with our Parents from the beginning still don't know Father. Father gave the members so much, he loves the members so much.

In Jin Nim: If members are working hard, every night he is not sleeping, he is praying. If he hears that a member died, it hurts him even more than it does the member's own parents.

Heung Jin Nim: It hurts True Parents so much. Father works so hard for the members, for their well-being, for their safety. But members often don't give themselves one hundred percent. Physically, they are in the church, but their mind is sometimes off. That is true of everybody, even though they try their best. You are all human. But True Parents expect a lot from members.

In Jin Nim: You know, because Father fulfilled the five percent responsibility which every man has, he is True Father and can carry out his mission and spread the truth of God to everybody.

Heung Jin Nim: He tries to help you in every way, taking part of your responsibility and part of your burden. Father is carrying half of your responsibility and burden for you.

In Jin Nim: All we have to do is carry out Father's words. But Father himself had to climb the steep hill. He himself established this Unification Church, a basis on which we can spread our religion and philosophy all over the earth. Of course, God gave us 95 percent of almost everything we need: the people, transportation, etc. It is so much easier to spread the news. It would be a different story, maybe, if True Parents were not here physically, but they are.

People look at Father in ordinary human terms. But Father is more than just what they see. They see Father eating well, but that is not true. He has been through all the burdens of man: he has been tortured, starved, you name it.

Heung Jin Nim: Nobody knows what Father has been through.

In Jin Nim: We sometimes say, "I did this, I did that; therefore, I am great." But Father does not say that. He doesn't even tell us all his life. He is fighting not only against external man, but also against the spirit world. We must restore even the spirit world. When you can receive so much blessing up in heaven, why search for blessing in this external world? Our life in this material world is like a piece of dust; that's short compared to the spirit world. If you only work just a little harder, try your best in this world, you can receive so much blessing when you go to the spirit world. But the problem of man and his fallen nature is that he always wants immediate happiness, immediate fulfillment of his needs. Man must learn to look at the future.

Heung Jin Nim: Often people just do the work they are told to do, without trying to do things on their own to help God, Parents and all the members around the world. People think they should do something more for somebody, but when they are physically tired and exhausted, they stop. But that is not enough.

In Jin Nim: Parents already completed their 21-year course.

Heung Jin Nim: Parents are exhausted. The night before he spoke to you, Father didn't sleep; he was talking to the European leaders.

In Jin Nim: As one of their children, I can tell you that when they are home and I want to talk to Father or Mother at night, they are never asleep.

Heung Jin Nim: Early in the morning, when they get up and come down to breakfast, members are waiting there to eat with them. We don't get to eat breakfast with Parents, we don't get to spend any time with Parents. Members are always there to talk with Parents. Father loves us very much, but duty comes first.

In Jin Nim: I am sure that when you have children, you will feel this. You will always want to spend time with your children, more than anybody else. But if the children are getting in the way of Father's mission, he will not care about the children, but rather go on with the mission. This is the kind of strength you must achieve within yourselves.

Heung Jin Nim: Parents give everything for you. He gives up his children, his wife, anything. First comes the mission and the members: the people he cares about the most, the people who will make the Kingdom of Heaven on earth come true. But people don't work half as hard as Parents hope they will.

In Jin Nim: Parents are only trying to save you. You are doing this for the future generation and for the happiness that could be achieved here. Why can't we think as one united Unification Church, instead of focusing on our individual hardships and difficulties?

Heung Jin Nim: I find that many people are jealous of others. I am sure some people think, "How come that person gets a bed and I have to sleep on the cold floor?" Think of Father. He has been suffering so much, but he has never thought that way. He has always humbled himself more than he needs to.

In Jin Nim: For one week in prison, Father was not allowed to sleep. The only food they gave him was a ball of rice. Father would take only a quarter of that, and the rest he would give to the people who were starving. Can you say that Parents have a better life than you? Did you go through more suffering than they?

In Jin Nim: Since Father has achieved all that he could, why can't we let him rest? Why can't we carry on?

Heung Jin Nim: You see, Father won't rest, even though he has finished his mission in the world.

In Jin Nim: It's our turn. But yet he still wants to do it.

Heung Jin Nim. He wants to set a stronger and better foundation, in order to make our life much easier. Father's work is done. His purpose in this physical world is done. But yet he struggles and carries the burden for us, in order to make our lives easier. Still, sometimes we don't realize that.

In Jin Nim: Man is always looking for his own happiness, but why not think about our children's happiness and the future generations' happiness?

Heung Jin Nim: Father gave the weapon to overcome all evil: truth with love, but are you using it?

In Jin Nim: Many people say that Father is getting so involved in material things such as money and buildings. But religion must be able to reach man in every aspect of his life. There was no way our church could survive in the material world without money. If we didn't need money, we wouldn't use it.

Heung Jin Nim: Many people criticize Father in this way, and often members cannot answer these accusations.

In Jin Nim: Father is working for the future; you must understand that he is not doing things for himself.

Heung Jin Nim: You know, he never bought anything for himself; he never even bought a pair of socks for himself.

In Jin Nim: We have to buy things for Father, because he would never buy them for himself. Even Mother, too. And even when he receives presents, he gives them to the members.

Heung Jin Nim: The father of a schoolmate of mine is a reverend. He asks for donations, and now he has a collection of 26 Rolls Royces. That is what he uses the money for. He even takes his son with him to dirty places. And he calls himself a reverend! He preaches God's word and asks for donations, and with that money he bought 26 Rolls Royces.

In Jin Nim: Is Father asking you to make money for him? Religion must touch every aspect of human life and the human soul. That is why we are studying now; we have to be able to reach people at every different level, even the professors. Our mission now is to study and to take all the ideas and understand every different kind of human thinking and human ways. Then, when we are ready, we can go out into the world and reach all different kinds of people.

We go through many problems too; we have so many difficulties, like you did when you were going to school. You know how bad the schools are? We constantly have to judge between right and wrong.

Heung Jin Nim: Our mission now is to go to school and study and learn. But we very much want to be with you members.

In Jin Nim: Even though you may not think so, we go fundraising and witnessing during vacations.

Heung Jin Nim: All the blessed children around us are working right now; during vacations they are supposed to go fundraising. I don't think we are the best.

In Jin Nim: I think many of us have interpreted Father in many different ways. Sometimes, when you are working so hard and your leader is pushing you to do certain things, you lose faith. But why should you lose faith when there is a spirit world? When you are not able to talk to a human being, you can always talk to spirits, if you try.

Heung Jin Nim: Father always told you that you should be better than he, that you should be another Reverend Moon. Don't put yourself down! Don't resent your central figure for pushing you so hard.

In Jin Nim: You know, God is fair. He cannot force someone who doesn't want to do something.

Heung Jin Nim: Father has the choice of whether to do it or not. But because he has deep faith and trust in God, he thinks that the harder he works, the better it will be for his members and his family, so he works harder. He doesn't care about himself. Even here, he humbled himself lower than anybody, lower than people walking along the street. Father does not care for material things.

In Jin Nim: And then Father is hated by everybody. The only people he has are our Unification Church members. Do you know how much it hurts him if his own loved members go out of the church? Everybody in the whole wide world hates him, and the only people who love him are the members -- and they leave.

Heung Jin Nim: Father hears reports of people leaving; it's like children running away from home.

In Jin Nim: Their excuse is that life here is difficult. But do you want difficulties to last for all eternity or just for this short time? All men have to go through suffering.

Heung Jin Nim: Father's children behind the iron curtain are suffering more than any one of you and dying for what they believe, but some people think they have the hardest situation. Think of what Parents are going through.

In Jin Nim' We need a place where Father and Mother can stay without being disturbed. How are we going to restore the world? We have to work so hard.

Heung Jin Nim: Parents forgave you millions of times and gave you another chance. He told God that things would be done, but Father's own children did not do it. Then Father again has to ask God's forgiveness; again and again, Father has to repent and ask forgiveness for you, to give you another chance.

In Jin Nim: Even your little mistakes become a burden for Father. Hasn't Father already lived a hard enough life?

Heung Jin Nim: Could anybody else in the world take what Father has taken? But Father still has the same spirit and enthusiasm. He will keep this up until he passes away, and he knows that he will pass away soon, so he has so much trust and faith in you to take over the mission. He can't be with you forever, you know.

In Jin Nim: What's going to happen if our Parents pass away? Are we going to just sit around here waiting for some revelation? Spirit world can help you only if you try, if you put your effort into it.

Heung Jin Nim: Spirit world is fair to the person who works hard.

In Jin Nim: God is always fair. Just because we are True Children, He is not going to protect us always. It is our responsibility to keep this position.

Heung Jin Nim: God is fair. He has a law which if He changes Satan can accuse him.

In Jin Nim: Father cannot change something just for our sake, because Satan is always there. God and Satan are always close, as close as an onion and its skin. If you do something wrong, then Satan is happy. But when Satan is happy, God is always there crying.

Heung Jin Nim: God has such a big, loving heart, but He has suffered for 6,000 years. He has seen His own children act according to the fallen world and even die. He is looking at this world and trusting us, us few members, to restore the world.

In Jin Nim: We are the only hope for making God smile for once in His life. We are His creation. We have to love Him. The way to love God is to love True Parents.

Heung Jin Nim: Parents weep to pay for your mistakes.

In Jin Nim: Imagine if the whole nation hates you and the whole world is persecuting you, you have no place to hide. Look at all the killing and shooting that has been happening. You think it can't happen to Father?

It's easy to think about our dignity and difficult to go out in front of people and do what is right, what is truth, because this world is so evil. Even when the truth is given, the people are not confident of it. We really have to believe.

Heung Jin Nim: You must understand Parents' heart.

In Jin Nim: He has been tortured so many times, you know. They made him do double the work of a regular prisoner. Even a regular prisoner could not survive more than six months. But with the help of God, he survived for many years. What we are going through is nothing compared to him. You think Father has never been spit at, cursed at? Do you think he has always been sitting on a chair giving directions? Do you think Father never felt the hunger, pain and sorrow that man feels?

Heung Jin Nim: When you are persecuted and looked down upon, you have a central figure to look upon for comfort, but all Father had to hold him up was his faith in God. You have Father, God and your central figure, but you still...

In Jin Nim: How miserable can a man's life be when even his own children leave him? How much more suffering does he have to experience? Father will go on, even if all of you leave. He will do this to the end.

Let's feel this way about the Principle. It's the truth, and it is with us right now. Let's use it! We have the sword, let's break down the evil. Our strength and our vitality is given to us from the spirit world, if only we try. We have the potential.

Heung Jin Nim: We are in no position to complain at all. A lot more Christians have been persecuted in the past. You are in the privileged position right now, you are living with the True Parents. Do you know how many people in the spirit world want to have a physical body so they can work with True Parents? Do you know how many people are longing to stand in your position? Do you know how many are jealous of your positions?

In Jin Nim: Behind you there are many, many direct generations of ancestors. They can all be released from suffering just through your actions.

Heung Jin Nim: When Father makes jokes about spirits rooting for you and cheering you on, that is true. Thousands and thousands of generations of your ancestors are looking to you. You are their only hope for liberation.

In Jin Nim: Imagine, if you leave the church, how many ancestors will suffer and cry. All the saints who died believing in Jesus Christ suffered very much. We are so much better off.

Heung Jin Nim: They had only part of the truth, but we know almost everything. We know exactly what we are striving for, but although they knew only a small portion of what they were supposed to do, still they gave their one hundred percent. We have everything, but who can truly say he or she gave one hundred percent?

In Jin Nim: Every person has complaints when he is not comfortable, and Father also felt the same way. But Father is a living example, and we have to really follow the rocky road he has taken. We all must follow it as his disciples. We can never match the suffering that Father and Mother have gone through. Our suffering is only part of their suffering, and we really must respect Father for what he is doing; we really must give our life to this mission.

Heung Jin Nim: You might think that when you do something that is not right, nobody will find out about it, but Parents know. Believe me. You might think that because there are so many members, Parents do not care about you; but that is not true.

In Jin Nim: People always want something more, something right away. Why not be content with what we have? The only thing you need is the truth.

Heung Jin Nim: The only things you need are clothes on your back, three meals a day, a roof over your head and a place to sleep. When Father was starting, he didn't get half of that. Many times Father slept in the streets. His first church was built of cardboard. So many people lived in that place, too tiny even to stand up inside. You had to crawl in order to enter. Not only did Father sleep there, but many of the first members as well. Father didn't ask for anything more. He didn't ask for a better house, better living conditions, more food. The worse things got for him, the more he thanked God for all the things He had given. Father's best friend, the one he literally carried across the border on a thousand-mile journey, left him.

In Jin Nim: Even when Father gives life, people leave. Although you came here to the church and received new life, you are attracted to what you call fun in the outside world. The life of faith is not easy. That is the first thing you hear in the Principle. If the life of faith were easy, any man could achieve this, and the world would not be chaotic like it is now.

Heung Jin Nim: When you are born, you have the chance to walk the road towards God or towards Satan. It cannot be easier to walk the road towards God; He has to be fair. What Satan has put in front of you is much more comforting, much more relaxed, much more joyful than what you encounter in the road you have to walk to find God. So most people take the easy way. But once you reach the end, it is no longer easy, believe me; it is the worst torture. Then and only then do you realize that you took the wrong road, and then you have no chance to go back.

In Jin Nim: You don't realize it, but Father has been tortured so much that his skin is not hard any more; it is soft. Even looking at the scars from his tortures, you just cry. We have been through nothing compared to him and Mother. God! But Father, even though he has been through all that suffering, has never asked Heavenly Father for help. He is always saying, "Father, I'll do it, I'll do it." He accomplished this all by himself. God gave him the mission and he did it.

Heung Jin Nim: Yet he works that we may live without toil. We don't even deserve that. We have a chance to bring the world back to God. Father has gone over all the obstacles and made it easier for us. Everything is in front of us, the tools are waiting for us. All we have to do is pick them up and walk.

In Jin Nim: The days are passing by, and we are just standing here. Time doesn't wait for us to restore the world. It just keeps on going. We have to follow the time, we have to catch up and really restore this world. We cannot just stand here and expect the spirit world to help us.

Heung Jin Nim: Father cannot wait for you; he is already an old man. We have to be always in front of him. We have to pull Father, we have to pull True Parents. They are always pulling us, all of us, all the time -- not just one single day. Have we been in front of True Parents pulling them, laying the foundation for them? They are always laying down the foundation for us.

In Jin Nim: Father is always thinking. When it is time to sleep in the West, in the East is already morning. So Father feels that even though it is time to sleep, now, the people on the other side of the earth have awakened and are going out to suffer once more. He cannot rest when he is thinking of all those members.

Heung Jin Nim: How can you sleep when every day your children are facing danger, when every day they are dying? Our conditions are so much better than those of people in the iron curtain countries. We have True Parents right here with us. They never even see True Parents, yet they call him Father. We get to receive too much of Father's and Mother's love.

Heung Jin Nim: Satan is working harder than any of us. God is relying on you for everything. How can you sit down to rest? We have it so good.

In Jin Nim: We have everything; we are so lucky. There are members who have died without seeing True Parents, but you are living, and you see Parents here. That is like the best blessing.

Heung Jin Nim: Think of members who have strong faith and yet have never even seen True Parents.

In Jin Nim: To wear the title of member of the Unification Church is strong armor.

Heung Jin Nim: Let's face it. All of us are afraid to go out and tell people we are a member of the Unification Church, afraid of what people will think.

In Jin Nim: We are afraid of what other people will say about us, we are afraid of persecution and suffering. But the more you try to avoid suffering, the weaker your faith becomes. The people who are direct are the strong ones. The people who try to take the easy road usually fail. Even the top fundraiser, the one whom members admire as such a good person, could lack faith.

Heung Jin Nim: Parents used to say, "After you have fulfilled physical joy, what have you gained? You gained nothing beyond the moment." If you work hard now and fulfill your five percent responsibility, imagine what eternal joy you will have in the spirit world! The eternal joy that your sons and daughters will have a better life on this earth.

In Jin Nim: Don't you want all your children to grow up in a peaceful world and do everything based on the Divine Principle and love?

Heung Jin Nim: If your five spiritual senses are open, everywhere you go you can see your ancestors following you, guiding you along the right road. In the spirit world. people are suffering so much.

In Jin Nim: You know how many people in hell yearn to end their life but cannot? They are spiritual beings. People in hell are constantly repenting, because they did something wrong when they had their physical body.

Heung Jin Nim: People are risking eternal suffering for one second of joy in their life. We are here to save them, or at least to help them. But how can we help them if we cannot even help ourselves? Someone who has negative thoughts cannot help others. Think that your suffering here is nothing compared to what you will suffer if you lose your spiritual life. You will feel eternal hunger; food will be right in front of you, but you cannot touch it.

In Jin Nim: That is hell.

Heung Jin Nim: Everything you need will be right in front of you, but you will be unable to reach it.

In Jin Nim: How can we doubt the Principle? If it weren't the truth, we would not have all this persecution. Good is always persecuted, no matter what. Look at man's history of suffering, how awful it is: ups and downs, ups and downs, always searching for the truth and never finding it. Well, we have it right here. That is why we are receiving so much persecution. Satan is afraid of the truth, afraid that people will realize the truth and go back to God's side. that is why he is so much on your back, giving you second thoughts about the church.

Heung Jin Nim: Don't think that Satan is so strong. You know what Father said: you have the power to deny him. But when you don't do it, you are accepting Satan's will and denying God, you know that? Every time. You have the weapon right in front of you.

In Jin Nim: We as true daughters and sons of True Parents must really wake up and accomplish our mission. We have no time to waste. If we sacrifice ourselves, we can have eternal blessing and the eternal happiness of our ancestors and our children. What more could we want?

Heung Jin Nim: Live for the sake of others, for the sake of your fellowman.

In Jin Nim: We still have so far to go. We cannot just stand lazily around. Like Father said, you can never run away from the truth. The truth will follow you forever. It's time to really digest this truth and make it the center of our life.

Heung Jin Nim: If you know this, how can you turn the other way?

In Jin Nim: Even when Father was suffering, he was always giving, giving. What did he take from you? Don't think that these are just easy words. Even though you are receiving blessing from True Parents, you are in a scary position, actually.

Heung Jin Nim: You may think, "I am nothing; I am just a member of the Unification Church." But that is not true. The hopes of thousands and thousands of spiritual beings rest on you.

In Jin Nim: People have an original mind; they know what is right and what is wrong. You know the truth, but you are doing what your body wants you to do. You have to be able to dominate your body.

Heung Jin Nim: We all know that the mind should be subject over the body, but the tendency is to want better clothes than other people have, better food to eat.

In Jin Nim:: Through our sharing with you today, I think many of you can now realize how much suffering Father has gone through. When Father comes down, please give him the warmest welcome ever and promise to accomplish what he asks. Tell him not to worry and to please rest. I think we should be able to tell that to Father and feel from our hearts that we can do it.

Let's make Father happy for once -- not only with our words, but with our actions. Let's show him he can trust in us.

Heung Jin Nim: Everybody here, let's promise to Parents that we will do the job.

In Jin Nim: Words come easy, but actions must follow your words. You could be talking Divine Principle all your life and yet not be keeping anything, if you don't put it into action.

Heung Jin Nim: Father has been doing this all for you people. Father is going to the people, not asking them to come to him. He is bringing the truth to all kinds of people: businessmen, fishermen, religious people, scientists. It cannot be done easily; it cannot be done without pain. You might think that you are suffering for Parents, but you are not; Parents are the ones who are suffering the most.

In Jin Nim: Many members' problem is that they really have no time to think over the day. They have to go out every day to fundraise, or whatever, without any building up of faith. But I think even ten minutes of meditation really helps. Instead of thinking of your mission as a daily chore, tell yourself, "I am on the battlefield; I'm fighting. I must really win the victory over Satan today." Set up your goal for the day.

Heung Jin Nim: You are not doing this just for yourself. The more indemnity you endure, the more blessing you will get at the end.

In Jin Nim: Many people love Father, but love must be expressed, you know. If you really love True Parents, do your mission. When you go to the spirit world, don't you want to live in the heart of God and feel the warmth of His love?

Heung Jin Nim: Let us pray together.

Most beloved Father, thank You for this day You have given us. So much suffering Your son has gone through. All of us wish we could love You like that, Father, every day of our life. We have not given our hundred percent for You, for True Parents. Now that we have learned more, Father, let this enter into our soul and our motivation, Father, and keep us close together. Satan tries to come and sepal ate our family, Father, but now we have more reason to keep strong.

Everywhere we go, we see Your children suffering, Father. Six thousand years You have been weeping, looking at Your children suffering, yet You cannot do anything, Father, until Your children can do something about it.

Please help these members, Father. Please forgive them, please understand that we try our best, that it is difficult for all of us. We repent most deeply from the bottom of our heart and pray that You may accept our repentance once again. From this day, from this moment, we can start a new leaf, Father. We want to hear the name of sons and daughters of You and proudly call True Parents Father.

I shall never leave You, Father. I shall always be with You, Father. We all love You very much. Please give us one more chance to prove it. You have suffered enough, You have suffered more than You deserve to. Let us take Your burden, Father, let us take Your suffering.

All of us are grateful. All this we pray in the name of our most beloved True Parents, Amen.