Unification News for September 2002

I Kissed Dating Good-bye

by Sally Sayre

Smart love unlocks God’s best for our lives. When I stopped viewing girls as potential girlfriends and started treating them as sisters in Christ, I discovered the richness of true friendship. When I stopped worrying about who I was going to marry and began to trust God’s timing, I uncovered the incredible potential of serving God as a single. And when I stopped flirting with temptation in one-on-one dating relationships and started pursuing righteousness, I uncovered the peace and power that come from purity. I kissed dating good-bye because I found God has something better in store! (I Kissed Dating Good-bye, by Joshua Harris, p.24)

This past summer I had the opportunity to briefly meet Joshua Harris, author of I Kissed Dating Good-bye. Although I was disappointed with his message at the Creation 2002 worship service I attended, I was inspired to read again his first book which was published in 1997. As I shared my enthusiasm for this book with other Moonie moms this summer I was surprised that many I spoke with were unfamiliar with this work and the wisdom it contains.

If your children are in middle school or older, you need to read this book, and, more importantly, have them read it. As Unificationists we have precious few resources outside our movement that serve to educate our children about the spiritual pitfalls of dating. Josh Harris writes authoritatively and from his heart about his own reasons for giving up a selfish pursuit of short-term romance. (p.26) Not only does he point out the negatives involved in dating, but he also writes movingly about the rewards of waiting for romance. One young woman he quotes found her longing for love brought her to an intimacy with God in prayer that she had never experienced before. (p. 147) Although Christians do not understand the real story of the fall of man, Joshua Harris uses a strikingly familiar analogy when he encourages young people to be patient. Like a fruit picked green or a flower plucked before it blossoms, our attempts to rush God’s timing can spoil the beauty of His plan for our lives. (p.76)

Even if our sons and daughters have pledged Il Shim and wear a ring, and are serious about the promise they’ve made, they can receive support and encouragement from reading this book. They can learn how to explain why they don’t date. They will also gain insight on the need to guard the purity of others.

As I told Mr. Harris in June, "You have helped inspire a whole generation of youth to remain pure." I thanked him for the way his book spoke to my daughters. It will do the same for your daughters or sons.

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