I know what your waiting for, yes I know what you want, you want something .. Just and sacred. I know your deepest secret dream,

Yesterday at M.C. one young outside employee came to me in tears. One of the older outside employee had ripped a telephone out of his hand in the middle of a call to his sick mother, he then proceeded to verbally attack and humiliate him in front of others. Finally, calling on his seniority and position he justified his actions as doing his job.{ read responsibility.}

I know what you long for.... in the quiet hours when you're all alone ... something true and powerful... able to shatter the darkness and the silence of the night.

In my early years in the movement there was one brother who was the C.F. in charge of myself and several others. He was extremely tough and old testament like, and it so happened that he made our lives very miserable. Also at that time the overall C.F. complicated things a bit by stressing one point above all others, never complain at all... but especially never complain vertically.

So there we dwelled, caught between the rock of the absolute tradition we were trying to establish, and a hard place,(the unyielding heart of Cain}. We being resourceful rascals if nothing else created a saying .. a slogan that could principly identify and contain the dynamic that was causing us so much trouble. A code of honor and a companion to walk with us along our thorny path. Something that could strengthen our faith and determination. You've got to just S. and S. we would remind each other whenever the going got tough. S. and S. meant initially, {Servant of Servants and shut up and suffer}. But over the years it evolved into {Shhhush and Serve} and finally {Silently Substantiate yourself.} I think there was a brief period of time when it meant {SOMEDAY YOU S.O.B.} but I may be mistaken.

Anyway always there was the belief that by applying the principle we could bring God into the situation, as aggressive objects we had the power to pull God through any subject. Even one who was not ideal.

I think I know what we wish for... what we want most of all whether we're inside people or not.. whether were generals or just foot soldiers.

.....Ah, but one must be careful of what is wished for because you probably will get more than you bargained for.......

The messiah has come, the true parents are here, and after years of incredible heartache and suffering victory is at hand. So what is it that's on the hearts and minds of the weary warriors at this moment in providential time? Even the vast spirit world with all its soldiers and all its stories seems poised and waiting, waiting for what was promised but was not delivered.What is it were waiting for? I'll tell you what it is. Were Waiting for the lightning from heaven. The vertical adjustment. The righteous strike, that will bring low all evil doers, and bring justice to the long suffering. We want to be able to pull God and the his righteous judgement through INSTANTLY at any given situation. We want judgement day. The only problem with this is most or all of us consider ourselves in the righteous long suffering category, and very few are honest enough with our selves to see we are the ones that need the adjusting. I see this dynamic as having three possible causes. We lack the courage and humility to truly look at our selves and to identify and work on our problems so we project them elsewhere. Or we rely to much on law and position and not enough on heart, Which is a continuation of the first problem. Or out of control positive thinking, ie. ( I'm certainly not out of line if something bad happens to me or whatever I'm doing,or if anyone tries to criticize me It's not I that need to make an adjustment I must be paying indemnity for something else ....yea that's the ticket. Which is also an extension of the original problem. If we follow this line of thinking all the way back, I believe we arrive at the heart of the matter. Failure to see from Gods point of view and inability to receive Masculine love, {which frequently asks or pushes you to do something you don't understand or don't like or both}.Inability to perceive and accept masculine love, Isn't that a huge topic ? Do you think lucifer had a problem in this area.

It's a huge topic because it precedes and includes restoration through indemnity and the sacred traits and traditions of humility loyalty and filial piety. It also moves into the realms of man and women relations, and education and culture to name a few. Here's a sad fact whenever you start talking about Restoration through indemnity { which was still the main tenet of our movement the last time I checked}, or object responsibility and humility. I seem to get this strange reaction from some . They get this look on there face that I can only describe as a city slicker forced to listen to a young country bumpkin.... while simultaneously tasting a doo doo candy bar. I believe stubbornness or arrogance to be among other things a severe learning disability.The great crippler of young adults.

I'll tell you a story, Twenty years ago when I was a much younger man... in many ways ....I was sitting in a cafe with a good friend.

His name was James Heber Marnie, he was a tough as nails street smart longshoreman. He was also one of the brightest most sensitive

men I've ever met. That might sound like a strange combination to you but the neighborhood we grew up in was like that, a primitive predominantly blue collar type of place, but it had a savage honesty and a kind of innocence and honor that's hard to explain.It also was chock full of characters. Marnie's mother was a warden at one of the prisons and could trace her ancestry almost back to the original colonists, in fact one of her relatives had signed the

declaration of independence. Marnie's father was a simple man, a dock worker who had died when he was just a teenager, and he was recalling for me the story of there relationship. Once when he was eleven years old he got into a fight with a boy who was a few years older, and was quickly taught the error of his ways. He ran home and with tears in his eye's explained to his father what happened. His father listened patiently to his tale, then took him back outside turned and said "when you can beat up the fellow who kicked your butt, then I'll let you back in the house. He then went back inside and locked the door. As he continued to explain how hurt he had been and how much trouble and resentment had resulted, he suddenly began crying as he slowly started to realize the depth of his father's wisdom and love. It seems his father knew he didn't have a long time left to live, he also realized he couldn't afford a good education for his son. Therefore the chances were good that young James would follow his father's footsteps and grow up to be a longshoreman. A particularly brutal and dangerous way to make a living. Finally he knew why his father had treated him that way. He had to quickly teach him to become the confident fearless young man he would need to be in order to survive. Life was tough, life was war... there was no other way.

Here's the way I see it, That great and terrible day is approaching, rapidly. I can feel it in my bones. i've heard it said that when God has a nation, that's the condition for judgement to come to everyone and everything, that we should quickly identify any remaining bad habits and mercilessly cut them off. If ever there was a time to stop pointing fingers, and take a good long look in the mirror it's now. S and S my friend, S and S .

I believe the first attempt in all of history of masculine type love, asserting itself, and asking for sacrifice in order to substantiate true love was misunderstood and ended in failure.

I believe absolutely in the true parents and the true family.

I believe absolutely in restoration through indemnity even though there are times when I am sure I'm losing my mind. When deceit and selfishness are so thick and enveloping it's almost impossible to go on.

I believe humility and loyalty to be the two greatest virtues.and the most precious things in the eye's of God and the True Family.

And finally I believe I know what you want, what you wish for what your asking for in your heart. The question is Do you ...... really?

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