The Words the Hose Family |
I Am Here
David Hose
October 25, 1996
Good morning. Before we begin I want to give you My advice, and that is that whenever we have a time to talk and we agree to continue the subject in another session, then it is best to have that session as soon as possible, when the atmosphere is still very strong from the first talk. I know that this past week was very full. First, H [husband], you have a health problem and second, you had to leave the city. But, please, from now on try to make it an important point to follow up quickly when we agree to add something from the former talk.
I am very happy this morning to share with you something that is vital for you and all of My children to truly understand. It is not easy to achieve, but even to have a clear picture of this in your mind and heart is a good, strong beginning for you. I do want to speak about what you have called conditional and unconditional love. H began to write about these things on the airplane yesterday, but because of mental fatigue and his own inability to concentrate fully, it was impossible to truly have a clear, focused communication. Finally he put the writing pad down and slept. So this morning I want to go back to share from beginning to end what it is that we wanted to share before.
First, I must say that you have spoken about this matter of conditional and unconditional love as if there were two kinds of love. This is a big fallacy. There are not two kinds of love. There is just one kind of love and that is unconditional love. Actually, even the name "unconditional love" is, in a sense, wrong. There is simply "love." And that is My love that comes from My heart and that you have within you.
To call it "unconditional love" is like saying "wet water." The fact is once you truly know water, you would never say, "I would like a glass of wet water." Your friends would look at your in wonder. It’s the same with love. Once humanity truly knows the only love -- My love -- they’re not going to say, "I unconditionally love you" or "God is unconditional love." Again once you know, you needn’t say "unconditional." You just say, "I love you" or "God loves us" or "We love God," because as there is only one kind of water, there is (even more so) only one kind of love.
And I want to more than just talk about the problem of what you have called conditional love today. I want to speak more about this thing you have called unconditional love -- in other words, My love.
First, let’s look at the situation of fallen humanity. What is the outcome of the Fall? It’s a blockage between your own original heart/mind (at the very center, at that most inner place in your heart) and your response to the outer world, your outer emotions, your outer thoughts, and so forth. It’s a wall. It has been a wall or a blockage between that most inner place and the outer place. And as I told you not so long ago, there is an inner love and an outer response, which is an outer expression of that love. There is an inner mind and an outer mind as well. And so when you recognize the blockage between the inner component of yourself and the outer components, which should be originally objective to those inner components, you’ll see how that cripples you. Are you following Me?
Okay, I want to say it again: You have an original inner heart/mind, but isn’t it true that you also have an outer mind and an outer heart? And an outer thought and an outer emotion? And everybody in the world knows this. Isn’t it so? No one is going to argue that they don’t have a brain or a mind or that they have emotions. Everyone agrees whether they believe in Me or not. But the part of humanity that has been misunderstood and not clear is that inner heart/mind. That’s why I have wanted to share about this with you over the past months and years. It is from that inner heart/mind that you understand the true meaning of who you are, what life is, what this world is, and what relationships are. And it’s also from that inner love that you truly know the meaning of love. Is that so? Is this clear?
As I said, humanity has been blocked from that inner heart/mind, that meeting place, that special garden in each one’s heart with Me. What has happened is that you tend to operate from the outer aspect of your emotion and the outer aspect of your mind -- those emotions and those thoughts that have interplay with the world around you -- and are, in a sense, unconscious of the more important interrelationship with the inner heart/mind.
So you are coming more from those outer thoughts and emotions. In other words, you’re not centered. Not in the true sense. What happens in your life when this kind of state exists is that your emotions always pull you out of yourself. And because you don’t have the strong center in that original heart/mind, then where does your center lie? Actually, so much of the time it lies outside of yourself.
For example, a man sees a beautiful woman and his emotion goes out, and suddenly she becomes the center of his attention and he loses himself. She takes his heart away as she walks down the street and, therefore, he has longing and desire. And maybe the next day another beautiful woman walks by, a completely different person. Then again his emotion goes out and is stuck on her some way, like an arrow going out. Wham! And then she walks down the street with his emotions and disappears. So this man is constantly centering himself outside of himself. It’s not only the case of man-to-woman or woman-to-man emotions, it’s in so many parts of your life.
For example, you see someone who is highly regarded. Let us say a college professor highly regards another student and you feel, "Oh, that student is much more intelligent and insightful than I am." So your emotion of envy and feeling of incompleteness and almost loneliness go out of you to that other student and his or her relationship with the professor.
Again you’ve lost yourself in this outside situation and you’re feeling alone. In this way, can you see how controlled you are by the things around you and not by the true things within you? And everyday in your lives as you relate with the world, as long as there is this blockage or ignorance of your own inner heart/mind, that true center that is eternal and absolute within yourself, you are constantly pulled out of yourself. There will always be someone who is more intelligent. There will always be some beautiful woman in front of the man’s eye or some very desirable man in front of the woman’s eye. Therefore, as I said, your center is not within you.
When you imagine that you are in control of your own life, think about these things, and reflect back on your life and how many times you have felt these emotions of envy, desire, loneliness, and of so many things that represent you centering outside of yourself. That is why this world is in the state it is in. If this ignorance, this wall, can be removed to where the inner heart can connect with the outer emotion and the inner mind can connect with the outer mind, there will be no such trouble anymore.
What is this inner heart/mind that I speak about? It’s truly the mind and heart that created this universe. I’ve shared it with you completely within yourself. Do you understand that? You can know so much as you realize and understand the truth of that, that it’s not a duplicate or a copy of My inner heart and mind. It IS My inner heart and mind that is within you. It’s not a copy of My love within you; it IS My love within you. And so as it says in the Bible, "Greater is He that is within you than he that is within the world." But because you have been ignorant of that greatness, you always think that the things around you are greater than you, and naturally you want to go out to those things. But you can’t. Everyone suffers from this kind of problem.
Then in light of this, what is this love that you call conditional? It is the state of human beings who have been caught with this ignorance and this blockage between their inner heart/mind and their outer emotions and thoughts. Therefore, they are functioning with this kind of state. As I said, their center is outside of themselves. What goes on between those kinds of ignorant individuals and the people and situations around them is very conditional and very limited.
For example, the man who is looking for something from that beautiful woman that he has noticed suddenly realizes that she has looked over her shoulder and smiled at him. Then he feels wonderful and lifted up, like heaven. But just a few minutes later he sees her smile at another man and then he feels hell. It’s like, "I see, actually she likes him more." Maybe this woman wasn’t thinking anything, but this man’s whole day is going up and down according to one little gesture from her. So in one way his heart and emotion go out to her fully in one moment and then are withdrawn and come back to him in pain the next moment. This is the conditional life.
Beyond some romantic situation, let’s talk about friendship in this state of affairs between two people who have that ignorance. This is not true friendship. In other words, one friend (call him Joe) gives something to another friend (call him Jim). It’s a very nice tie for Jim’s birthday. Jim feels very good and says, "I really love Joe. He’ll be my friend forever. He knows just what kind of necktie I like." Then several days after the birthday, Joe says something that seems insensitive to Jim. Then suddenly it’s as if the necktie never existed. Jim thinks, "I see; that’s how you actually feel about me. Well, I don’t like you either, and we don’t have to have this friendship." It’s possible Joe didn’t mean anything by his remark. The next day it could go the same way only in reverse and Jim could hurt Joe’s feelings. The friendship was not based on that inner heart/mind. It’s just based on reaction and response between these two outer people.
Isn’t that the way life goes on in your world every day? Love and affection are given and withdrawn, almost like money, and it’s a very sensitive thing. People feel either closer to or further from each other according to just one sentence, one moment, or one look. It shows a blindness of the inner heart that is so tragic, because whenever you have tasted in your own life the true meaning of friendship or true love, it is such a much greater thing and so much more lasting a thing than this kind of conditional situation that I have spoken of.
You can reflect on so many different situations that involve what you call conditional love. I don’t want to go into all kinds of examples, but let it be enough to understand that the conditional human being is that person who has lived in ignorance of that inner heart/mind.
And what is My love that is within each of you? First of all, yes, as water is wet, My love is unconditional. This love comes from the heart. I think it’s important for you to know that it’s not just love that you have within you that comes from Me. It is a heart. It is My heart of creation. You inherited it as My sons and daughters, and on that very foundation My love is extended to you. Please understand that if you say you are loved by God, it’s not so much that I created you and, therefore, I love you. It’s more the matter that I projected Myself into you and that My presence is within you.
You ARE the heart and the love of the Creator within creation. So TRULY, rather than saying, "Yes, God loves me," in ultimate reality you ARE My heart. You ARE My love. Then to think that if you disobey Me or do something foolish on a given day that I can just withdraw that heart or that love from you, this is foolish. It’s impossible! That eternal heart, that eternal ability to love, that eternal consciousness, again the thought, the mind aspect of that heart, is within you as the very center of yourself, of your spirit, ultimately your eternal spirit.
When we speak of overcoming this so-called fallen nature, it means removing the barrier between your outer emotions, outer thinking, and outer feelings and the inner component of that eternal heart and mind so that then your center is firmly fixed within yourself -- and actually always has been but you just didn’t know it. And as you go into the world every day, the gravity, the true and eternal gravity within your inner heart/mind will determine who you are rather than just the things you see and respond and react to outside of yourself. Do you understand?
Because you have missed that connection, you identify yourself in a million ways. You see one person and you say, "I don’t like him. I’m his enemy." You see another person and you say, "Oh, I’m in love with this person." And day by day because of all those different reactions and responses, you become a million different people. To one person you look like a saint. To another person you look like a devil.
To one situation you feel no confidence whatsoever and become shaky and insecure. In another situation you become almost like a guru, a very proud and strong person. These are all manufactured by this outer feeling and outer thinking of yours. And so you’re a million different people every day. But the question comes: Who truly are you? And that will only be answered as you remove this barrier between the outer feelings, thoughts, and identities and the inner source of your true being, which is this inner heart and mind -- which, I must say again, is not a copy of My heart and mind. It IS My heart and mind projected into you.
That is why the Kingdom of Heaven is absolutely possible, because at the center of each of you is this universal presence. It is the most holy place. It is the altar wherein I most fully want to dwell and live from. Not the altar in some church. I don’t care, as I said before, if there are ten tons of gold on that altar in the church or however beautiful it is. That altar has been created and made by artists who are ignorant of that inner altar within themselves, that inner heart/mind. And so the altar in a church means very little to Me, in the ultimate sense.
That is why it is important for you to be working to remove the fogginess, the ignorance, and to build the connection between that inner heart/mind and this outer thinking and feeling that you have learned how to live with. And recognize again what it means when we say, "I am the son of God" or "I am the daughter of God." It means something VERY profound.
The quality of that love that comes from that inner heart/mind is an eternal quality. When you see from the Creator’s perspective (which, again, is within you), then truly you become the center of the universe. That is why someone like a Buddha said, "I am the sole existence in heaven and earth." It’s absolutely true. And each of you has that potential.
There are not a million "I’s" everyday; there is one great "I" within you, and it is not controlled by the ups and downs of the situations around you every day and by who you meet and what they say or don’t say. It is not controlled by Me either. It is not a matter of you obeying Me. It’s a matter of My consciousness within you, and that is what truly guides your life. Too many people think of Me as being somewhere else giving orders to them, and then they do their best to obey. They think that this is a faithful life. No, this is not truly a faithful life. This is still a very childish notion. It is My consciousness within you, so we’re talking about one thing and not two things.
Also, when you talk about self-esteem and how to help people, especially children, have self-esteem and how they can respect themselves, this is a very big topic today in schools. Well, speaking in the ultimate sense, think about that for a moment. To have self-esteem means you are looking at yourself and saying, "I respect and love myself." But that’s not where you want to be either, because that still represents two things:
I + love + myself. Who is this "I" that’s loving this self? Ultimately the key point is that in maturity you are the person who can say, "I am love itself." "I AM love ITSELF," not "I love myself." And so that’s two going to one, and to become that one with Me and, therefore, with My creation is the key. And as you have recognized and as you have brought forth this great Eternal Presence within yourself and through your life, you cannot help but recognize it in each and every other person.
And here is the second part of what I want to say. Speaking again of persons who have this block between their outer heart/mind and their outer emotions and thoughts, as they look around them (especially those who have taken a religious way of life) they tend to look at others whom they may recognize as not having as much truth as they or not having as good a relationship with Christ (let us say, since you are in the Western Hemisphere), and they may judge another person and say, "I have a greater light and his belief is wrong.
My relationship with Christ is truly profound and his is still not." Many times, from religion to religion, you look at each other from the terms of who’s right and who’s wrong. It’s a very merciless type of attitude that you have and have had toward one another. We could say that kind of self-righteous attitude is how certain religions have grown in history, because they go out on the streets and urge the people, "Come the right way. Don’t go the wrong way."
Okay, it’s true that a religion or faith can grow this way. Many people may follow it, especially if they do see greater truth. But the problem here that ultimately must be confronted, especially when we speak of the Kingdom of Heaven, is that when you look from that original heart and mind that is within you and remove that blockage of ignorance between the inner heart/mind and those outer thoughts and feelings toward other people, then you see that I am looking at all people and simply wanting step by step to bring them all to that ultimate knowledge, to that ultimate point, to the Kingdom. So it’s not a matter of who’s right and who’s wrong.
Think, for example, of the situation in your own family. You see your sons, your one boy and his younger brother. Maybe the older boy is quite proud because he understands more about you as parents than his younger brother does. So with quite a bit of self-righteousness he goes to the younger brother and says, "I know the parents better than you do, so I’m right and you’re wrong." And he uses that almost to "hammer" the little brother’s head.
Does this do anything to help the little brother? No. There is just a resentment that builds and a feeling of oppression. And there’s no appreciation for what that little brother does have. So the little one says, "You didn’t even notice what I did make. You just want to judge according to yourself." You as parents look at that and your concern is very simply how to bring both brothers along from wherever they are, how to lift them up, how to help them take the steps they need to take. Even if one is a hundred miles ahead of the other, still you have to deal step by step with the one who is behind.
As true parents you’re never going to say to the younger one, "Look how slow and far behind you are. Your brother is so much better. He’s right and you’re wrong." No. They are walking on the same road, and you have to be able to help each one step by step from wherever they are.
That is how I look at this world. If you imagine the life of an Adolph Hitler or a Josef Stalin, it’s easy for you looking back on history to say, "They were the most evil men who ever lived. They killed so many people, and they were wrong." Yes, it’s true, they were wrong in what they did. But they, too, had that inner heart/mind. Within them there was a terrible ignorance of that. And so they were caught by the same responses and reactions, the same prejudices, jealousies, and all other ignorance that you have been caught by in your life.
Of course their lives were far more disastrous for the world than yours have been, but the ignorance was the same. So it’s easy for you to look at them and say, "I’m a much better person. I’m right and they were wrong." But from My point of view My question is, how can I bring those two sons on up the road to the Kingdom? In the spiritual world, shall I put them in a cage and let them spend eternity in punishment for their sins? That’s not My ultimate concern. Maybe that’s what you think should be done, but My ultimate concern is how to break down the wall of ignorance between the inner component of those men, their true and original heart and mind within them and the terrible ignorance that their lives represented; how to let them come out of the prisons they made for themselves and ultimately stand on the same mountain top that St. Francis would stand on, or that Jesus would stand on, or that Buddha would stand on.
To bring everyone to that same mountain top together -- that’s My concern. So I cannot afford to look at the world and other people the way that you have. And you cannot afford to continue to look at the world the way you have in the past either, because then you will continue to have self-righteousness and people demanding they are right and others are wrong. That means more war, more killing, more distortion, and ultimately the entrance of evil into local, national, international, and world situations. And so the ignorance has to be done away with, and this inner heart/mind has to emerge through each life. And if I have to start with one, two, three, or half a dozen people, that’s fine with Me. Ultimately it has to start with each and every one of you. It can’t just start with a million people at once. It starts from each person, each one. That is why I want to share these things with you.
I want to remind you here that it is very hard in English or in any other language in the world to truly convey what it is that I try to say to the heart of this speaker who is making this tape. That is why I can only finally try to speak through that inner heart/mind to each and every person, one by one. Too many times you’ve become lazy reading your holy scriptures and letting them replace your own connection, and listening to your holy men and women and letting them become the replacement for your own connection. If you were to question them deeply, they would tell you the same thing.
This is the Kingdom and this is the world that I long to see, when each of you can take the steps to make that connection. And again I say to you -- and I end with this -- that it is not outside of yourself. You are not reaching out for the God that is owned by someone down the street. Because then again those are your outer emotions and feelings taking over, that "I want the God that so-and-so has. I want the God a messiah has.
That’s the God I want." But then you are caught by comparing your life with a messiah’s life. "He’s so much greater than I am. How can I ever have that kind of God. I am nothing. I’m wrong and he’s right." Here we go again! Isn’t it true? That same greatness is within you. It’s not a matter of reaching outside and trying to have something you imagine someone else owns and that you don’t. It’s within, reaching within yourself. That is the key! I AM HERE. Every time you ask Me I will say, I AM HERE. I am here. I am here.
I end with this, this morning, and I ask you to really pray and meditate on these things, because even reading these things cannot help you if you are only thinking of the one who sent them or the source being the person at the other end of the post office. No. It’s within you. And that’s what I want to tell you this morning. I am here. Take the time and you will see a profound change in your life. Your center will no longer be outside of yourself, but indeed within yourself. Any saint, any messiah, any TRUE and sacred holy person in history would tell you the same. You have that same quality within you. And if you don’t, then I did not create you. But you do. You do.
I want to close with that this morning and ask W [wife] to pray.