[David]: This morning Tacco had a lot to say honestly about where I stand right now with regard to things we've committed ourselves to -- primarily the book that is to come out of these many years of the talks. I've announced it already for a year but it hasn't taken shape in any final publishable form yet. And beyond any excuses or problems that have come up in how to proceed, I haven't been able to bring everything together. (And what she said has many other implications as well.)

We realized that this is not just my project but Your project, Heavenly Father. And that I need to reassess my whole approach as we begin this New Year of 1999. I have every desire to bring the book into being, but I think that I've let personal, subjective problems get in the way and hold up the progress, so I'm reflecting deeply on this as we begin the year.

[Heavenly Father]: You'll notice that I don't spend a great amount of time pushing you or urging you to do the things you've said that you will do. And yet I'm happy to see when you will, lovingly and firmly, urge and help each other compensate for the weak points in your maturing process. Everyone has great strengths and points of weakness. No one is an exception. No one. And so, as much as you are husband and wife, being partners in this way (which at times can be quite uncomfortable) is good for you. You need to bear with one another, yet at the same time give each other a poke once in a while to help with the journey that you're taking.

Love can be a very uncomfortable thing at times, especially for those who want only the sweet moments and the poetry. Yet the idea of marriage without this kind of commitment becomes very shallow. Please be aware of that and commit yourselves to helping one another bear those fruits. Tacco, if you remember, you were pruning at the time of your accident. Pruning seems to be an ability that you have. Removing the old growth helps the tree grow straighter and bear greater fruit. You were trying to do a bit of pruning on your husband this morning and I thank you for that.

Beyond any single project, I want to share something that is important for everyone to understand: the process of your growing up as a son or daughter to God. It relates totally with what you have been speaking about this morning.

First, I am challenged by your world in it's ignorance of Me, not only intellectual ignorance, but more centrally, spiritual unconsciousness of Me. This is an ignorance that goes far beyond reason or logical proof of My existence. It is an ignorance of the heart, an ignorance of the spirit, like a shade pulled over your world. So many have been operating in the darkness for so long that you know no other life, making My presence entirely debatable in your daily existence.

My first challenge is how to pull up the shade. This is not something that can be done in a collective sense or because one person comes and says, "Time to pull up the shade." As you know from your immediate family's experience, at any moment someone may be hungry to know what you have experienced with Me and another may not be interested at all. That is the undeniable reality of your world. Within one mile of your home today there is someone who hates the idea of God and wants nothing to do with anything that tastes of God, in thought, in feeling, or in any way, and there is someone who is passionately seeking Me. And the world is far greater than just the one mile from your home. There is every person with every kind of mind and heart beyond what you can possibly imagine. That's why I say that it is a great challenge.

And yet, as you said this morning, Tacco, the suffering that a person or even a group may have to go through does tend to allow an opening, bringing people to a place where they will reach out beyond the comfort of their daily lives to find something more. I wait for those moments in one life or in a million lives. It is My opportunity, and it is the beginning for you.

There's a second step through, and again I refer to your experience with Me: You pulled your shades up at that moment in your lives when you desperately sought Me. Within a few days your awareness of Me went to a whole different dimension, from intellectual and church-structured to very personal, very much within the heart. It became much more internal for you. This has been growing the past seven years, and it is good.

Is that enough? -- once this step has been taken, the shade has come up, the light is falling on your face, and you know that indeed you have a Divine Parent? Is it enough? I want to remind you that even a two-year-old child absolutely knows who his father and mother are. Does that mean the child is ready to leave home and go out into the world? No, because there's a whole personal growth process, and while that is grounded in his connection with his parents, it's not complete only because of that connection. It's complete when the child matures in taking responsibility for himself.

Here is where many people make their mistake. It is not enough to live in ecstasy or in the joy of knowing, even in a mystical sense, your God, your Creator. For day by day you are facing in yourself the process of education, and your course of study is very much in the world around you where not everyone may have that great an experience of Me. There will be forces and circumstances that will come up to challenge you. For example some may be abrasive or abusive to you; how will you respond to them? And there are forces within you that are very powerful; how will you raise up and develop them?

Yes, it is important to meet Me face to face, day by day. Many of you who are reading these talks are so happy to have your hearts opened as you come to a new level in knowing Me, but again, this is not the final step. Your challenges and projects are very much in your own hands, I can't do them for you. I can't substitute for that two-year-old child and at the same time allow him to develop into a mature person. This is in each of your hands.

So as you begin this 1999, it's a good time to look at the areas within your own life, your pattern of daily consciousness and behavior, and deeply, coolly assess it. As you look honestly you will have to admit that you are not one single being at this point in your growth. Parts of you are at odds with one another. Parts of you are even at war with Me, like little children who want nothing to do with that which is good for them. In essence you are One, but subjectively there are still many persons within you. This is spoken of in that struggle that Paul mentions in the Bible.

This is a time to take a higher road and find how to unify that self that you are. Many of those children inside you are not real, and as you take a higher road you will see them disappear -- but only with your deep inner effort and conscious daily living. This is important, and, as I said, something that I cannot do for you.

Bringing this book to a successful publication is your process, David. And it's not merely a matter of putting ink on paper, putting a cover on it, and sending it out. You will find that there's an inner project also that is part of bringing this to a conclusion. And so it is with any work that anyone does with Me: If it is to be done in a true and complete sense then the inner aspect of that work is to work on yourself. More and more the outer shape of the project and the outer result has everything to do with the inner result. Many people who have taken on a spiritual profession in their lives, especially those who have risen to places of great personal importance, have often been unconscious of this matter. It's best that they lose all their trappings of importance of all the high places that they have been given and come back down to earth and simply begin the inner work, without position, without the praise of those around them who are conditioned or trained to praise them. You live in a world of great conditioning, and it is an enemy for it almost always works toward that ignorance that I spoke of earlier.

By maturity, I'm not merely speaking of the deep or mystical consciousness of Me in your daily life but of your own full and complete response in every aspect of life. That means bringing the many I's together into one. Here you will find the greatest compassion and the ability to Do, to Be, day by day. On this point many spiritually-minded men and women have stumbled in the past. This is a year for you to begin to access the things within you that have no regard for that which you are doing this very moment in speaking and sharing with Me, allowing Me to speak to You and through you.

How would you feel if you had in your home a person who was bent on destroying it, or to a lesser extent was just totally irresponsible as he or she moved about -- like leaving junk and rotting food around and having no concern for you as the head of the home? You would want to discipline that person or, if he wasn't ready to change, ask him to leave. Well, in the home of your consciousness there are such beings who rattle around in your mind and your emotions doing whatever they wish to do.

Sometimes those forces within you may be very heavy and sad, or they may be angry, or caught by this or that passion which has nothing to do with that part of you that wants to become a fully mature and responsible son or daughter of God. So just as you would in your own external home take measures to discipline or ask that person to leave, you must in this year take that kind of responsibility within your lives, within your frame of consciousness.

I want to mention something about this Y2K problem that everyone is so worried about. Y2K means the year 2000 bug, I know. So many are worried about it, now writing books and focusing on it. I observe the fear of losing your systems of power, of connectedness, of daily life as your world has known it.

When I see the anxiety about the Y2K problem half of Me wants to laugh and the larger half of Me wants to cry. From My point of view you have been disconnected for a long time in ways very parallel to your computers going down and all your systems being broken. It is very parallel.

The larger Y2K problem is that so many have learned to live in that disconnected way; for so many years it has been this way. This is the larger, more crucial Y2K problem. Over many generations you have somehow learned to survive without that connectedness, and wars continue; the hatreds continue. Until that connectedness between you and me is reestablished the chaos on Planet Earth will continue.

Think of it this way. You have little villages of identities who have made their own little networks, and yet, like little tribes, are out of touch with the larger group. This is labeled primitive in your modern world, yet it is still the reality on the inner level in the lives of the very people who so label it.

In your modern world there are these smaller networks working. And these networks themselves are not really connected fully with the True Power Source. These networks are too often based on identity and tradition of a dead sort, not the living connection with Me that I spoke of earlier. So they are very limited, and ultimately self-destructive, not to speak of the destruction they manifest toward one another due to competition, antipathy, hatred, or misunderstanding.

What good are the solutions to your external Y2K problem if that network is used for the wrong purposes? This is the time to resolve the central difficulty, that internal Y2K problem that has gone on for such a long, long time in your world. Beyond the computer problem, the work that you are doing and the work that so many now are called to, is a step-by-step solution trying to be worked out to that more inner Y2K problem. Don't give up on this. It doesn't go fast and it's not an automatic thing. Steps cannot be made thoughtlessly, so I encourage you to stick with it. That book that you spoke about that we all want to see come out is one step. Please be aware.

My message this morning is quite simple although there are many complexities involved. It's actually always been simple, and when you come down to the very fundamental message that I have for you everything can be boiled down to a few simple points.

Remember what I said about your growth and your responsibility. Remember the challenge that you face that I cannot do for you. Take responsibility this year for those things that you've been letting go. Take it in a practical, daily way and you'll find much greater progress can be made.

I want to wish you the best year coming up. It's going to be a VERY eventful one. Stay close to Me each day. I'll ask Tacco to finish in prayer.

Please note new address and phone numbers:

David & Tacco Hose
1915 147th Pl. SE
Bellevue, WA 98007
(425) 653-0842
Fax: (425) 653-0843
Talks via e-mail: talks@usa.net

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