Book Four - True Family
Chapter Two - The Way of Love in the Family
Section 4. The Reason We Need Brothers and Sisters

Why do we have brothers and sisters? Why do we need brothers and sisters? It is because with brothers and sisters, boys can watch their younger sisters and elder sisters, and from them learn how their mothers grew up; and girls can watch their naughty elder brothers and younger brother, and from them learn how their fathers grew up. This is called the love of brothers and sisters. So, you should love your siblings. Also, you should learn to love your siblings as you love your father and mother.

You cannot love them if you don't learn how. So, through watching your brothers and sisters you learn how your parents grew up and you come to love them as your parents do. In this way, you will be able to love your mother and father even after you go to the next world. You need your brothers and sisters in order to be an owner of love without shame. Then, would it be better for brothers and sisters to love each other more than their parents or less than their parents? It is better that they love one another more. Why is that so? Because watching and loving your siblings is like watching and loving your mother and father when they were growing up. When you do this, it fulfills the condition of loving your parents from their birth to their death. So these brothers and sisters are connected to each other through such love. That's why I think this way.

Then in the case of the parents, the more children they have, the more they can learn about their spouses. For example, in the case of the mother, as she sees her sons grow up she could think, "Oh, that is probably how my husband was when he was growing up." So, loving the children is essentially the same as loving the husband the way he was before she met him. Also the husband could think, "Ah, my wife would have been like this daughter! She is showing me how her mother was when she was young," and so he would learn from her.

Through loving the children, he fulfills the condition of loving every aspect of his wife. The mother and father do not say, "Let us love only the boys and not the girls." They love their sons and daughters equally, without discrimination. So by having sons and daughters, a beautiful circle of love in the family is formed. The mother and father will treat the children equally. All parents are like this. So hating your brother or sister is a greater sin than hating your mother. This is the first rule in family education. (184-60, 1988.11.13)

Suppose one day you leave the house after having a fight with your brothers or sisters. The least you can do upon your return is to hold a party so that you can make them happy again. Ask for their forgiveness and tell them that you should love one another as you love your parents. Since brothers and sisters represent your mother and father, if your brothers or sisters are poor, help them and serve them as you would serve your mother. There is nothing more beautiful than this. The Kingdom of Heaven starts from there. (184-65, 1988.11.13)