A Precious Testimony About Father

Joe Kinney
July or August 1977

A great privilege of working at East Garden was having direct give-and-take with True Parents and developing a personal relationship with them. I had been at East Garden for a couple years and was fairly confident of my position and relationships. Then a brother who was blessed to a Korean sister became my assistant. His wife worked in the kitchen. They were physically and spiritually senior to me and I was still single.

The Korean sister thought that her husband should have my position. Since she worked in the kitchen and spoke Korean, it was pretty easy for her to give bad reports about me to those that would pass the information on to true Mother. Since I had (and unfortunately still have) a good deal of fallen nature there was material available for these reports.

Over a period of six months my relation with True Parents went from pretty good to terrible. Father and Mother refused to look at me or speak to me and wouldn't acknowledge my presence. Peter Kim told me Mother wanted me out of East Garden and that I would be gone soon. To say I was difficult and struggling is an understatement. The question that rang out in my mind was "In our church where do you go after True Parents kick you out?" When True parents are scowling at you for several it is definitely a challenging experience.

Finally every thing came to a head. Father called a meeting to combine the East Garden and Belvedere staffs and operations. This was shortly after we had bought the New Yorker and many offices that had been located at Belvedere were directed to relocate there. Father would call on each person, they would stand up, answer a few questions and get Father's direction. Father spoke one or two minutes to each person none longer, except to one English brother Chris Kilengback and me.

When Father spoke to Chris, He assigned him to be the first Western member to go to Tong-Il Industries Co. in Korea. I had been dreaming of that mission literally since the first day I joined the church. My heart sank; I felt that "my" mission had been given to someone else. Chris fell away soon after this meeting, and I went to Tong-Il company in February 1978.

Father called my name and began shouting at me red-faced and gesturing angrily. He repeated all the accusations of the past six months. I was the most selfish, most Cain type brother. I couldn't get along with any one and nobody liked me. But the last words Father said were the worst possible for a single brother to hear. Father said "Your personality is so difficult that I don't think I can ever find a wife for you!"

The room was absolutely silent. Everyone was looking down at the floor. In my heart I believed Father and knew that he was acting on false information. I had no complaint and redoubled my determination. However, to say I was devastated is an understatement. The meeting ended about 2:00 pm on a Saturday. I went out side and tried to continue to work, but by 4:00 pm I was in my room asleep. My usual Sunday am schedule was 5:00 am pledge and then attend Father's speech. I slept through both.

At about 10:00 am Sunday somebody was knocking on the door of my room shouting "Father needs the bus, Father needs the bus!" I was the driver for Father's bus and driving True Family on that bus was absolutely my favorite job ever. So at about 10:15 am, low spirit unwashed and unshaven, I pulled the bus up to Belvedere's front gate. I stood by the door as Father boarded. I was pouting so badly that my lower lip was nearly dragging the ground. Father looked at me to make sure I was still alive.

Usually when I drove the True Family and leaders on the big bus, I would remain with the bus for security when we reached our destination. This day Father asked one of the regular security to stay at each of three stops, and I enjoyed a ride on the New Hope, a meal in a Chinese restaurant, and a movie together with True Parents.

The next Tuesday Father called me to the breakfast table gave me a sample of a lead weight and asked me to make 5,000 within a week to use on the fishing nets at Barrytown, which I did. (That's another story.) After we that business was done Father and I just chatted one-on-one for 45 minutes. The conversation and atmosphere were wonderful. It was one of the high points of my life. After I left the dining room, the couple that had told so many stories about me were called to the dining room and directed by Father to a new mission. (Just for the record: This couple is still active in our movement and doing very well.)

Father may have spiritually known that the stories were unfair, but he had to hear them and act on them because that was his responsibility as leader. However if I could receive such a strong scolding without resentment, then Father could ask this couple to transfer with out any accusation. To this day, this episode remains a turning point in my life.

After a difficult period at East Garden (described above) when I had not been seen favorably by True Parents for several months, I graduated from that course and was again on good terms. I was doing some work in the sewing room in the basement, when Mother entered. Just the two of us were there. Mother looked at me work for moment and said "Joe Kinney I love you very much!" I immediately went to my room and recorded the day, hour, minute and the exact words in my diary.

Joe K