Family

Hyo Jin Moon
January 29, 2006
Belvedere
Transcription: T. K.

Good morning.

I'm in the process of debugging myself, so just bear with me today.

Today, I want to share with you about family.

How many people come from a large family? (Audience response) More than 10? (Laughter)

I have an older sister, older brother and,.many younger brothers and sisters and when you look at my family situation there’s always an issue, all the time -- resonating. Somebody always has a little more than the other guy.

In tradition in general, even in Western culture -- there are many countries in Western society that still hold on to certain kind of tradition, historical tradition. Let’s say having a monarchy. I need to have a certain, very strong way of thinking, in terms of government and politics and social structure. So there’s a basic structure that we pretty much accept. The reason I didn’t talk about it or mention our society already, is because it’s pretty much a given. In China, Japan, and Korea there are certain traditions that are just untouchable and it’s permanent and it always will be permanent.

So there are certain things that we always expect out of it and basically what it comes to even personally speaking my family situation, well there’s the horoscope way or even when I was growing up that he gets it more than me and I want to be equal, I want more fairness. (Laughter)

Of course all my little brothers and sisters, they like that too, they want that stuff more than anything because, I guess, someone, some unfortunate sole like me is the primary cause of all that ruckus.

So when you think about that situation, I don’t know, is that a blessing? Depends on how you look at it I guess. What if you got nothing? I don’t think that’s a blessing. What if you have everything is that a blessing? I don’t think so either. It could be a primary source of greater conflict and ruckus to come. So you can’t really just accept certain things just because it’s there, Because there’s a story behind the story, right? Always, because we’re human. In a human society even down to the microcosm level or single family, you know family, that stuff is real.

There’s a story behind a story. Why? Because they’re individuals who make up a greater something and it moves up. So as it moves up obviously the story gets larger and more complicated because there is a story behind a story behind a story… blah, blah, I don’t know. So that’s the basic kind of complex reality that you have to kind of sort through if you want to do something like make changes in society. So you have to try to understand, so basically even when we talk Principle, we talk about Principle in a very simple way. We know you must first understand when you go through the rigors of basic workshop up to an advanced workshop, we try to understand the reality of subject and object relationship.

Starting with that let’s just start with that. What is the point of going through the rigors of being educated about that relation of subject and object, which is fundamental in Divine Principle. And just trying to remind us how to think and how to approach how to analyze how to understand not just myself but that guy, the subject, and that is the basic. That is the basis of trying to, you know, kind of pound you with the basics. And that is the essence of what we have to walk away with after hearing all those things over and over and over again. Not just knowing myself, but what about that guy?

That is the basic, the premise in which why we go through the rigors of going through those workshops and being drilled with things over and over and over, because it’s difficult. Why, because it’s ongoing. You have too many times ... the greater difficulty and practical reality is that things happen -- you have to understand and learn at the same time, in real time. And it’s changing constantly. It’s not always just linear and stagnant, it’s constantly flux and many times the peaks are higher, many times the values are lower, it’s not always consistent and even if it’s always on the course of a ripple. It is very, very organic. That’s the problem that we face. So based on certain kind of even simple measurement or standard of measurement we have difficulty because sometimes it peaks above it sometimes it dives under it.

So how do you measure yourself, when things like that happen? In those circumstances what is my duty, I guess, what is my, you know, responsibility to somehow secure myself to give me some kind of stability. Because in the end you’re in control of yourself in terms of stability, right? Because you’re in control of your actions in the end! Right or wrong, you have to face up to your consequences if you want to be responsible. If you want to deny responsibility, yeah you can do whatever the hell you want. But if you want to be responsible you have to make that responsibility and creating that stability for yourself. So how do you go about doing that?

Well let me just start from myself, you know. I have a older sister, I know she wants to be me (Laughter). And have a lot of younger brothers and sisters who want to be me to. Some have it more than others and that’s fine with me. But I think about, so how do I fit in with even just the basic family situation -- that we all have as person who’s standing in front of us, who has a position whether I like it or not, it’s not voluntary stuff. It was just shoved (Laughter), given to (Audience laughter) I had no choice. I lent myself for that, no, you know what, it doesn’t come like that just, hey do that, okay? You’re just stuck with it forever. Alright, so what can I do with this stuff.

So in this kind of horizontal… the funny thing is, the girls, they, you know, my little sisters they’re constantly complaining, “I want to be treated like the boys, I want equal treatment, I wanna so everything like a man, How come all these boys get all this preference treatment” Blah, blah, blah… on and on. And I, you know, okay, okay, okay no problem I can handle it. But some of the other boys might not agree (Laughter). So pretty much the girls want what the boys have and whether it’s younger or older. But the boys want what the older brother has. (Laughter)

And in our unique situation because we have Cain and Abel type families and children centering on Father, you know, Cain family they want what Abel family has (Laughter). But it’s all this kind of chasing around, stuff, and what are you chasing basically in the end? That’s about it. That’s the cause of the problem, a bunch of them, pretty much general conflict 99.99 percent of the time that’s about it. It’s very rare to fight over something else. And that’s it! And it starts from your family, whether you like it or not.

I’m not special. We’re not special in this case, you understand me? Everybody has this problem. It’s pretty much universal and that’s the sad part. Right? That’s the problem that needs to be resolved. So how do you go about that? What would be the ideal… kind of... I guess position, of an ideal elder son? Let’s just say the boys are over here and the girls are over here, if I’m stuck in the middle, because I pretty much have to stand in the middle, and to allow them to come in and have access to above, to the vertical. That would be the ideal, elder brother. Not always hogging it, but multiply, selflessly, if you can do that, always, then you can pretty much create peace, all the time.

Wouldn’t you say theoretically speaking. It seems so simple, but it’s so hard to do. Why? Many times, you know, we have different things that we like. I guess because of character differences, or personality differences we like certain things more than others and many times it’s difficult to accommodate all that difference. The problem is because of that. Because of everybody... based on a situation, of course it’s constantly, hopefully, moving forward, expanding, growing larger and stronger. But sometimes that growth, you know, is not fast enough to cover the demand. And you seem powerless or you seem, I guess, you know, not caring to the people that are demanding. That’s about it.

If only those who are demanding something, at times, be just a little patient you can recover from that kind of potential crisis. But sometimes stuff gets the best of the situation. What’s the stuff? What do you think? You fill in the blank. And why do you need to have it so quickly? What are you going to do with all this stuff when you have it? If you have everything that you want, what are you going to do with it? I see what you do with it, that’s about it, I don’t think that’s a good thing, man, that’s going to come and bite you on the behind, any time soon (Laughter).

And I’m worried about that stuff. And it’s not because of... I don’t know how to do that, and kind of try to avoid it. You’ve got to know your limitation you’ve got to know your circumstances. And some things is not going to work so well, I guarantee you. That’s why you don’t do it. That’s why you avoid it. It’s not that you walk around shit, not because you’re afraid of it, it’s because you don’t want to step on it. I mean, you can get pissed off and you can do that. But you avoid it because, obviously... And that’s about it. And some times we just get too hurried and we want too many things all the time -- too quickly. Just walk away, sometimes. Just step back. I don’t really need it now. If you give yourself that kind of time and try to think about more positive things rather than very selfish things, maybe all those things, all that stuff that you want, might not be that important when you mature. Give yourself the proper time to grow.

I know the world is in a hurry. And what does it do to you? And you follow that and you become sensitive and sensible to that kind of stuff. What do you think you’re going to end up with? You’re just being like them, that’s about it. You’ll be chasing the same thing that everybody’s chasing. And the way they chase it and the strategy they use to chase that stuff... it’s nasty stuff, it’s not something that you want to be proud of, to be holding your heart to be proud of, forever stuff, I don’t think so. The glory might be temporary but if that’s what you chase, I can’t stop you. So that’s about it.

So how do you start with creating an ideal world? You start with yourself and your basic understanding of even your basic family that you grew up with. Even the family that you have if you have unresolved issues, try to make it up, try to do something about it. Start from there. Don’t look too far away, don’t look too far -- start from you. You, all of you have to have that cleared out and proper. That’s the only way we can start to influence society, right?

So if you want to go about it properly, let’s just be proper. (Laughter) Then we can talk about it. We can make a strategy that is real that can make things happen otherwise it’s just talk. And who gives a hoot about just talking. There’s plenty of people who can just talk. But let’s talk about something that can make a difference in you. So, I think that’s important. That’s the kind of stuff that needs to be said.

People need to talk like that. The more people talk that way and try to walk it, and I guess we can have a foundation to start making things different. Because we’ll have an army who can stand on their own and we can cover each others back. Some fighting you can’t just do alone. And that doesn’t mean that just because you have numbers that you’re automatically going to win either. In this stuff quality and speed matters in competition and you really have to work on those suckers, if you don’t do that it doesn’t work. So that’s about it. That’s what I want to share with you.

What’s family? Family’s about learning about proper stuff… proper order, subject object relationship. How to live with God?! For crying out loud. If you can’t live with each other in brotherhood just because you have this elder son stuff, how the hell do you live with your parents? How the hell do you live with God?

Brotherhood is this horizontal stuff, this is where we work out that ultimate quest of living with God. Rather than just seeing my little sister as… ”Arghh, I’m better than a boy”, well let’s see what good you got. You know, that kind of simple stuff. You do more of it and all that stuff goes away. It’s not that difficult if you just practice it. When you have a good family it works in a lot of situations because you’ve got this void of, you know, no communication. Jump starting it, that adds some tremendous challenge.

That becomes the greatest problem and challenge, but it can be done. And if it’s done, no matter how difficult and daunting it might be, if you do it, in the end it can be resolved, no problem. But getting that stuff ironed out, it’s important at every level, but one way or another it has to be done. And the more clear we are, the more focused we are the better soldiers we’ll be. No doubt about that. I believe in that stuff.

Anyway, I’m just here to perform, to give you a pep talk, right? So that’s pretty much all I have to say, I guess, not much, huh? As far as this topic is concerned.

So for you, I said to myself, I’ll be here every Sunday from now, but I have to go away for a few days, next week I don’t think I can make it, but the week after, I’ll be here.

So, take care you guys, alright?